Lollipoppin' Life

MUST WATCH LIST

2011-05-17T15:56:00.006+08:00

JOSEPH

2011-04-27T04:19:00.002+08:00

The title says 'Joseph'. And I'm not talking about a guy whom I just met, or any relative or friend who goes by that name. This is a name that was shared by 2 important figures from the Bible, but again I'm not attempting to appear religious or pious. As I am doing my class record work here, this name appeared in my head and I keep on thinking about this name on and on.

I'm not a Bible expert nor am I the enthusiastic History freak, but I do like to know things that occurred in the past.

The Joseph that I want to talk about would be the Joseph son of Jacob (from the Old Testament, the book of Genesis) and Joseph the Carpenter, the saint who took care of The Virgin Mary and Jesus. To start, what do these two men had in common? First of all, they were mentioned in the Bible (duh!). Secondly, their faith in God (okay, I know, slightly cheezy!). But what I like about these 2 men is that both were associated with dreams. Joseph (who later adopted the name Zaphenathpaneah when he served the Pharaoh) was what Jacob and his wife Rachel called "miracle child". Rachel was thought a barren woman previously and it was an unexpected pregnancy when she and Jacob begat Joseph, especially when Jacob was old enough to be Joseph's grandfather. Jacob had 11 sons before his marriage to Rachel. Jealousy among the older brothers caused the young Joseph to be sold to slave traders; the price that he had to pay for telling his brothers about his dreams:

"...He said to them, "Listen to this dream that I dreamed. There were we binding sheaves in the field, Suddenly my sheaf rose and stood upright; then your sheaves gathered around it, and bowed down to my sheaf." (Genesis 37: 6-7)

When Joseph was imprisoned after Zuleikha, wife of his master Potiphar, accused him of trying to rape her , he met the other two prisoners. Both told him of their dreams, the first one, a former royal butler, dreamed that he was at a vineyard full of healthy grapes on three branches and served the Pharaoh wine from the vineyard. Joseph interpreted his dream saying that he (the butler) will be summoned back to the palace in 3 days time to serve the Pharaoh. The other prisoner told his; he was a chief baker that served in the royal palace. He dreamed that he was carrying three cake baskets on his head and birds swarmed over him and ate the cakes. Joseph refused to answer but the baker persuaded him to interpret his dream. Joseph reluctantly told him that he was to be sentenced to death in 3 days time and the birds will be feasting on his corpse. The prediction came true 3 days later, but Joseph spent another couple of years in the dungeon. When the Pharaoh was troubled by his own dream, the royal butler remembered Joseph and told the Pharaoh about Joseph's gift of interpreting dreams. Joseph was summoned to the palace later. The Pharaoh dreamed that as he was standing by the river Nile, he saw 7 healthy fat cows feeding on grass by the riverbank. Suddenly another 7 sickly thin cows surfaced and ate the 7 fat ones but remained thin like before. Then the other dream he had; he saw 7 ears of fine and healthy grain on one stalk, and then 7 ears of thin ones blighted by the east wind, swallowed the fat grains. Joseph, who was a man of God, claimed that what would be coming out from his lips are God's words. So he told the Pharaoh that Egypt will have 7 years of great plenty all over the land and the other 7 years would witness great famine throughout Egypt. Pharaoh made Joseph a governor in Egypt.

The other Joseph, the carpenter, also a son of man named Jacob the son of Mathan, descendant of the King David. This man, was betrothed to a young virgin named Mary, the only daughter of Joachim and Anne. Mary, whom Catholics believe, was born without the original sin committed by Adam and Eve, miraculously conceived a child that was destined to be the Messiah. Joseph was shocked as he knew that he never touched his wife-to-be and he doubted the child was his. He even thought that Mary betrayed his trust. So when he tried to leave her, an angel came into his dream:

"..An angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will bear a son, and you are to name him Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins." (Matthew 1: 20-21)

When Herod the King of the Jews ordered all the infants in Jerusalem to be killed for he feared the child whom the 3 Magis claimed would be a king one day, an angel appeared once more to Joseph in his dream, asking him to bring his little family to Egypt. Joseph, the Virgin and the Child spent several years in Egypt and when Herod died, the angel appeared again in his dream, telling him it was safe to come back and they settled down in Nazareth.

My point here is that, these two Josephs believed in dreams that guided them to their destiny in life. One of my favorite authors, Paulo Coelho, wrote about Joseph the Carpenter in one of the fractions in his work "Like the Flowing River” under the title 'The Man Who Followed His Dreams'. He wrote:

"Joseph goes against what common sense tells him what to do and follows his dreams. He knows he has a destiny to fulfill."

I believe I am quite a dreamer myself and I do know that dreams that keep a person feels driven to make his or her life better. So dream good and great dreams, my friends!

Eight is ONG what??

2011-04-19T18:45:00.002+08:00

Yes, that's the number. The lucky number EIGHT! 8 months ago, my last post was written after the Eid trip to Batu Pahat. Within 8 months too many things have occurred, and I must congratulate myself for 're-surfacing' from quite a period of hiatus. Hello blogging world AGAIN!

To begin with, I'm currently in my break period from studies and am enjoying my work as children drama instructor in various schools around Klang Valley. It was tough at first, especially in terms of financial, but I'm thankful as things got better all along.

In the midst of joy working with kids, I went through phases that is in knowing myself during this holiday. Realizing true friends, or the ones who basically just want to "use" me for their own good. It's pretty daunting you know!

RAYA ALA JAWA

2010-09-14T00:48:00.006+08:00

Bertandang ke rumah Nyi (nenek).

Halwa Maskat, macam dodol tapi lagi susah prosesnya dari dodol. Sedap!

Anak-anak bermaafan dengan ibu bapa.

Ayam masak merah masakan istimewa Ibu di pagi Syawal.

Ayah Ajis dan Ibu Ayit saling bermaafan. Lovely couple!

Munjung, adat orang Jawa yang beragama Islam di Johor.

Kegemaranku di musim lebaran...Kuih Batang Buruk! Terbaik dari Batu Pahat buatan Ibu Ayit (Jack)

Pelita cahaya kemenangan!

Rezeki Aidilfitri...masih aku tak sangka..aku layak lagi rupanya!

Aku dan zaman bachelors degree

2010-08-30T21:15:00.003+08:00

Teringat mesej Facebook dari mak aku hari tu. Berkenaan dengan niat aku yang hendak berehat sebentar dari pengajian. Katanya, bapak aku bengang hingga mengeluarkan statement: Baik graduate masa umur 51 tahun!

Usia begitu krusial (crucial lah) sekali bagi sesetengah orang ya. Aku begitu kagum. Sebenarnya, aku sendiri tak pernah rasa yang diri aku ni seimbang dengan usia aku. Entah, bukan aku tak sedar diri, walau hakikatnya itu memang perangai orang tak sedar diri. Bukan nak perasan, minggu lalu aku bertandang ke rumah sahabat merangkum senior aku di fakulti di Bukit Kuching, di Meru rasanya. Adik-beradiknya tanya usia aku, aku dengan jujur membongkar usia sebenar (tidak perlu ku nyatakan di sini). Dengan selamba jawapan yang keluar daripada salah seorang adiknya: "(Kepada abang yakni sahabatku tadi) Apasal ko lagi nampak tua daripada dia?" Aku dan sahabat aku tu lebih kurang sebaya. Bukan salah sesiapa. Anugerah yang Esa. Cewah!

Aku terkenang balik zaman diploma aku dulu. Betapa kejamnya aku terhadap rakan-rakan. Aku dapat rasakan bahawa aku persis Adolf Hitler dalam jelmaan jasad seorang gadis comel. Ini kerana aku berjuang demi menebus balik kesalahan aku semasa aku bergelar siswazah jurusan pendidikan major TESL dulu. Aku sanggup berbuat apa sahaja demi merebut semula apa yang aku abaikan masa di fakulti lama. Semasa aku menerima skrol diploma di majlis konvokesyen 3 bulan yang lalu, aku sedar kekejaman aku dahulu.

Sekarang aku merasakan aku telah menjadi diri aku semula. Seolah-olah aku tak pedulikan hal di sekeliling aku. Kepekaan aku terhadap sesetengah perkara itu masih lagi sebati dalam diri aku cuma aku dah tak 'baik hati' macam diri aku masa zaman diploma. Zaman ijazah ini betul-betul memberi peluang untuk aku menjadi diri sebenar; seorang pejuang yang memberontak dan punyai pendirian yang sukar diduga. Akulah taufan gila dan akulah seniwati sewel yang tahu hidup ini cuma seketika untuk dinikmati.

I DON'T CARE. I JUST WANT TO BE HAPPY. SO BE IT!

Saya tak pernah hilang!

2010-08-30T00:24:00.002+08:00

Lebih dari 5 bulan primadonna yang sorang ni tak menjenguk blognya. 15 Mac 2010. Tarikh yang tidak akan aku lupakan sampai bila-bila. Hari tersebut tanpa kami warga fakulti sedari, saat seorang ahli keluarga kami pergi menghadap Ilahi. Allahyarham Firdaus Mazlan, pelajar tahun akhir jurusan pengurusan industri seni meninggalkan kami buat selama-lamanya pada 16 Mac 2010. Padahal malam sebelumnya arwah sempat lagi menulis di halaman blognya. 15 Mac 2010 tidakakan pernah luput dari memoriku.

Aku ingin berceloteh panjang tentang apa yang telah berlaku sepanjang lima bulan ketiadaan aku dalam halaman blog ini. Mungkin aku akan menulis dengan lebih lanjut lagi dalam post yang akan datang. Aku sebenarnya sibuk dengan pelbagai aktiviti dan projek di fakulti dan di luar kampus. Oh ya! Aku kini mempunyai pekerjaan sambilan, iaitu pembantu guru drama di bawah syarikat Blubricks milik Puan Katrina Lau Wai Ping, seorang guru drama yang sangat dedikasi dan baik hati.

Jumpa di post yang akan datang. Ingat ya, SAYA TAK PERNAH HILANG!

Catatan Mencuit Hati dari Arwah Yasmin Ahmad dan Arif Sebol

2010-03-15T10:46:00.003+08:00

Arwah Yasmin mencatat:

Eleh!

You tu memang gitu.

Kejap nak,kejap tak nak.

Takut I sentuh,takut I tak sentuh.

Bila I chakap hello,you mengeluh.

Bila I chakap bye-bye,you berserabai.

Sudahlah.I dah malas.

Tak de masa.

Banyak kerja lain.

Banyak mata lain yang gian nak ber-tango dengan mata I.

Banyak lidah lain yang hauskan bibir I.

Bibir I yang tebal tak tebal,

nipis tak nipis.

Senyum atau chemik,sentiasa manis.

Bibir yang basah

berginchu merah,cherah secherah-cherahnya.

Bayangkan,seperti yang you pernah bayangkan.

Bibir I, di bibir you.

Bibir I, di telinga you.

Di leher you.

Di dada you.

Di perut you.

Di pusat you.

Di peha you.

Di sana you

dan di situ you.

Bayangkanlah.

Jangan malu-malu.

Bukan I tak tahu.

Memang you pernah bayangkan dulu.

Eleh!

You tu memang gitu.

Dah tahu, buat tak tahu..

Stevie pula menjawab:

Tolonglah!

You memang macham tu

You ingat I tak tau

You nak lebih satu

Bila I pandang you

You pandang ke lain

You ingat I tak tau

You pandang dalam kain

Bila I nak pegang

You chakap

I mengada-ngada

You tak bagi I pandang

I tau you sengaja

Bila I kepit

You kata tak sempit

I duduk diam-diam

You kata tak ngam

I duduk kat atas

You pula malas

Tolonglah!

You memang macham tu

Suka buat I malu

Sampai tersipu-sipu

I geram kat you

Tapi I sayang you

You main chenta dengan I

Tapi now kata bye-bye

Rumah kata pergi

Kubur kata mari

Sampai bila nak macham ni?

Nak tunggu I mati?

Tolonglah!I dah lama bosan

Muka you tak ada perasaan

I bilang satu, dua, tiga

Kalau you maseh ada

From now on I dah tak ada!

You all bacha

I tak kesah

Bukan nak mengata

Cuma terlebih kata...

Stevie adalah sahabat yang baru aku kenali awal tahun ni, a very thoughtful and kind person. You guys can check out his cool blog here.

Sri Mersing goes theatrical!

2010-03-14T21:06:00.004+08:00

Dengan segala jasa baik rakan-rakanku Lan Abet and Siu, aku dapat peluang menonton teater "muzikal" Sri Mersing secara percuma, tarikh bersejarah itu adalah 13 Mac 2010. Jadi dengan 2 kereta berkonvoi dari Puncak Perdana ke Istana Budaya pada senja Sabtu yang lesu, aku ditemani Lan Abet sebagai ketua rombongan, Siu, Nini bersama tunangnya Daniel dan juga koreografer kami, Aby (cewah!).

Sesampai aku di perkarangan parkir Istana Budaya, aku dan Aby (Lan Abet dan ahli-ahli rombongan yang lain hilang entah ke mana) disapa oleh suara garau. Aku toleh ke kiri. Oh! Ayah Agi rupanya! Salah seorang pensyarah kami yang sempoi dan selamba. Sambil bertanya khabar (poyo! padahal hari-hari aku jumpa dia kat fakulti!), kami rasa amat ghairah tak tentu pasal. Ghairah dapat tiket percuma.

Tetapi, rasa gembira pesta kampung itu tidak lama hangatnya. Walaupun kami bersyukur dapat tempat duduk di Grand Circle (iaitu tingkat kedua di Panggung Sari), posisi tepi membuat kami berasa rimas kerana pemandangan dari kawasan itu tetap terhad. Apa boleh buat, nama pun dah dapat tiket free. Bersyukur sajalah!

Jadi nak dipendekkan cerita, aku terus ringkaskan sajalah pemerhatian aku terhadap teater ni ya. Overall - OKAY saja. Masalah teknikal banyak terutama sekali bahagian audio. Mikrofon para pelakon seperti ada masalah kerana pengucapan para pelakon tidak begitu jelas. Atau? Adakah pelakon itu sendiri yang mempunyai masalah 'makan' kata masing-masing? Apapun aku tetap tabik hormat pada penampilan pelakon-pelakon veteran yang juga pelakon-pelakon asal Sri Mersing versi filem pada tahun 1960an iaitu Rosnani Jamil (Mak Nani) dan Dato' Mustapha Maarof yang memegang watak Mak Sri (Sri Mersing yang sudah tua) dan Pak Sireh, ayah angkat kepada Sri Melati yang juga anak angkat kepada Sri Mersing (Siti Payung adalah ibu kandung Sri Melati). Elly Mazlein, pada mulanya aku sangat skeptik dan tidak yakin pada kemampuannya berlakon secara 'live', berjaya membuatkan aku malu dengan tanggapan bodoh aku itu. Ternyata pada malam itu persembahan Elly tidak kurang hebatnya. Adi Putra? Oh ya! Dia memainkan watak Damak, 'love interest' Sri Mersing, tetapi pada pengamatan aku, Adi Putra 'kureng' dalam bab nyanyian. Aku tahu nyanyian yang merdu bukanlah perkara yang sangat ditekankan dalam teater muzikal, tapi agak-agaklah!

Satu lagi yang menjadi bahan teguran kami berenam pada malam itu adalah 'backdrop slide' yang memaparkan kawasan kampung. Okay, zaman Sri Mersing aku kira-kira dalam kurun ke-18, lebih kurang. Kat gambar kampung tu, ada jalan tar...ya, aku ulangi..JALAN TAR!

Dah lah aku malas nak kritik ke komen lebih-lebih, aku tahun ni pun baru nak dalami ilmu pengarahan teater secara khususnya.

Aku kini sedang menanti komen pedas dari sudut pandangan Lan Abet dalam blognya pula,

Salam!

Sekadar UPDATE..aku masih HIDUP lagi!

2010-03-09T09:47:00.003+08:00

Salam semua, dah lebih 5 bulan aku tak menyumbang apa2 kat blog aku ni. Bagi mereka yang tak tahu apa yang telah terjadi kat aku..meh la aku story...AKU DAH BERGELAR BUDAK BACHELOR DEGREE woot woot! Azam tahun ni, sebenarnya tak ada azam pun, cuma aku nak jadi lebih santai bila menulis kat ruangan blog aku ni. Aku dah slow down sket temper skarang ni, katenye...Mana tak nye, aku cuma ada 3 orang classmate semester ni! Well actually 11 orang sebenarnya, 7 jurusan sinografi dan 4 jurusan pengarahan teater. 2 kumpulan jurusan ini cuma bertemu pada masa-masa tertentu sahaja.
Baiklah aku stop kat sini dulu, saja update supaya korang tau aku wujud lagi, tak pi mana2 pun, insya-Allah akan panjang umur hendaknya.
Salam semua! :)

Rais Yatim - I have changed my MODE

2009-11-28T01:19:00.001+08:00

My brother showed me this clip about one of Malaysia's ministers during a press conference a little while ago. To my shock, Rais Yatim, the one who has been 'preaching' on our people Eastern norms and culture ( especially 'budaya kemelayuan') was seen responding heartlessly (and perhap MIND-lessly) to a reporter from one of Malaysia's leading newspapers, The Star.
So, when we speak in English, does it mean we glorify the Westerners? Datuk Rais, from here, I can guarantee that many BN voters will shy away from you. 2012 ya? A dangerous year it is! Oh have you watched the movie (2012)?

Ding dong bell, wedding bells are ringing!

2009-11-26T02:30:00.006+08:00

It's school break once more and it's time for lovebirds to exchange their marital vows in front of the altar. Brides-to-be must be thinking what kind of dresses would they want to wear on their big day.

At this age, I've started to think about settling down. Therefore I've spent quite amount of time browsing through pictures found online.

I prefer sleeved gowns because wearing one makes a bride looks more decent and demure. I still believe that there's no need to flash off some flesh on one's wedding day!

Picture 1:

Simple and elegant

Picture 2:

1920s are back! Love the veil.

Picture 3:

This reminds me of Shakespeare's Lady Macbeth. Dramatic yet simple, and I can already imagine what type of veil to be worn on the bride!

Picture 4:

Personal favorite, I like the veil!

Picture 5:

Simple and yet not many brides want to wear this style on their big day

Generasi yang sopan-santun

2009-11-24T21:45:00.004+08:00

We do hear every now and then that youngsters nowadays need to be taught on proper manners. Well, I guess sometimes the older generation should stop 'picking up the bad sides' of the young ones. I was busy snapping some pictures for a friend when a boy meekly emerged with a mop in his hand and began to mop the floor while his friends were doing their gig on the podium. Funny but this really happened before my eyes. Had a great laugh over this picture with my brother.

Anak Raja Soliman

2009-11-24T00:32:00.004+08:00

Dahulu, di kepulauan Luzon di Filipina, wujudnya seorang pahlawan yang gagah perkasa bernama Raja Soliman. Sebagai seorang pahlawan yang juga ketua puak yang menghuni di pulau tersebut, Raja Soliman mahsyur dengan perjuangannya demi menjaga Kota Manila daripada dijajah oleh kerajaan Sepanyol. Raja Soliman disegani dan pada masa yang digeruni oleh semua kerana keberaniannya serta kegagahannya dalam menjaga para penduduk di pulau itu.
Raja Soliman juga sangat menyayangi keluarganya. Hasil perkahwinan dengan isterinya, mereka dikurniakan dengan seorang puteri yang diberi nama Puteri Solimya. Puteri Solimya dikasihi dan dijaga bagai minyak yang ditatang terutamanya ayahanda Raja Soliman. Puteri comel itu adalah segala-galanya bagi Raja Soliman dan isterinya.
Tahun demi tahun, Puteri Solimya meningkat remaja dan berubah daripada seorang anak kecil yang comel yang petah berbicara menjadi seorang anak gadis yang begitu cantik serta lemah lembut tutur katanya. Raja Soliman juga semakin sayang akan puteri tunggalnya namun adakalanya baginda risau akan keselamatan anak gadisnya itu. Kecantikan Puteri Solimya tersebar luas di keseluruhan pulau Luzon serta pulau-pulau yang berdekatan. Ramai raja-raja, putera-putera serta anak-anak golongan bangsawan yang datang dari jauh semata-mata ingin menyaksikan kecantikan Solimya dan tidak kurang juga yang datang merisik untuk menjadikannya sebagai suri hidup masing-masing. Namun, segala peminangan ditolak bulat-bulat oleh Solimya dengan alasan puteri itu belum bersedia untuk berumahtangga. Raja Soliman amat risau dan kecewa dengan tindakan Solimya, akan tetapi baginda tetap akur dan menghormati kehendak anak kesayangannya itu.
Pada suatu hari, Puteri Solimya mengajak para dayang-dayang istana untuk bersiram di tepi sungai berdekatan dengan istana Raja Soliman. Ketika mereka sedang leka bersiram serta bercanda, Solimya tidak menyedari bahawa sepasang mata sedang memerhati gerak gerinya. Jejaka tersebut sebenarnya tidak sengaja ketika lalu di kawasan itu kerana pemuda tersebut sedang memburu haiwan di hutan.
Pemuda itu telah jatuh hati pada Solimya dan mulai bersembunyi di dalam semak setiap kali Solimya datang untuk bersiram di tepi sungai itu. Pada suatu hari pemuda itu cuba untuk menyorok pakaian Puteri Solimya dan ketika para dayang sibuk mencari pakaian puteri, pemuda itu keluar lalu memperkenalkan dirinya kepada puteri itu. Solimya pada mulanya agak terkejut dengan tindakan pemuda itu, namun kemudiannya setelah mendengar penjelasan dan luahan perasaan pemuda itu, Solimya juga mula jatuh hati pada pemuda tersebut. Mereka mula berjumpa tanpa pengetahuan Raja Soliman.
Bak kata pepatah orang-orang tua, sepandai-pandai tupai melompat, akhirnya jatuh ke tanah juga. Raja Soliman dapat menghidu perbuatan Solimya yang mencurigakan itu. Raja Soliman menjadi lebih terkejut apabila baginda mendapat tahu pemuda yang dicintai oleh Solimya itu merupakan anak kepada salah seorang musuhnya yang tinggal di sebuah pulau yang terletak agak jauh daripada kawasan jagaan Raja Soliman.
Maka Raja Soliman menitahkan agar pemuda itu ditangkap kerana menyangka pemuda itu adalah pengintip bagi pihak musuhnya. Ini menyebabkan Solimya berdukacita atas tindakan melulu ayahanda yang disayangi serta kasihnya pada pemuda itu. Raja Soliman menjatuhkan hukuman mati ke atas pemuda itu iaitu dengan meletakkan pemuda itu ke dalam sebuah guni serta kaki dan tangannya digari pada sebuah batu yang berat. Kemudian Raja Soliman menitahkan agar pemuda itu dicampak ke dalam laut.
Pada malam sebelum hukuman dijatuhkan, Puteri Solimya menyelinap ke dalam tempat tawanan untuk berjumpa dengan kekasihnya. Oleh kerana terlalu sedih dan tidak sanggup untuk berpisah dengannya, maka Puteri Solimya juga masuk ke dalam guni tersebut lalu berpelukan dengan kekasihnya. Keesokan harinya, sebelum fajar menyinsing, para pengawal mengangkat guni tersebut lalu mencampakkannya ke dalam laut. Ketika guni berisi Solimya dan kekasihnya hanyut ke dalam air, salah seorang daripada dayang menyedari kehilangan Solimya. Setelah puas mencari Solimya, barulah mereka menyedari bahawa Solimya telah pergi berjumpa dengan pemuda itu. Lalu para pengawal diarah untuk mendapatkan kembali guni berisi pasangan kekasih itu. Ketika mereka diangkat ke atas kapal, kedua-dua pasangan itu sudah tidak bernyawa.
Raja Soliman mula menyedari bahawa tindakannya menghukum pemuda itu tanpa usul periksa telah mengorbankan nyawa puteri kesayangannya juga. Mulai pada hari itu, Raja Soliman nekad untuk berdamai dengan bapa pemuda itu yang juga seorang pahlawan di pulau yang jauh daripada kepulauan Luzon.

Jadi, pengajaran yang kita dapat daripada cerita ini adalah:

1) Jangan berlagak sangat apabila sudah pegang kuasa.

2) Jangan manjakan sangat anak-anak.

3) Jangan mandi tepi sungai jikalau sudah ada jamban dalam rumah.

4) Jangan mudah jatuh hati pada pandangan pertama.

5) Untuk para jejaka terhangat di pasaran, tolong jangan usik anak dara orang.

6) Jangan tunjuk berani dengan masuk ke dalam guni dan membiarkan diri dibunuh.

7) Jangan gaduh dengan jiran. Tidak baik untuk kesihatan.

8) Fikir sebelum bertindak, periksa sebelum syak seseorang.

**Jikalau ada yang hendak menambah pengajaran daripada kisah menyayat hati ini, sila-silakanlah tinggalkan komen anda ya. Terima kasih.

(P/S: Minta ampun banyak-banyak, disebabkan tiada gambar Puteri Solimya, maka saya meminjam imej Tristan dan Isolde, pasangan yang menerima nasib yang sama!)

Back in action!

2009-11-23T13:54:00.004+08:00

Fuh! Dah hampir 2 bulan aku tak update blog aku yang hina-dina ni (humble konon!). Ini semua gara-gara diploma showcase and final projects dan examination. Tak tau samada aku lepas atau sangkut. Aku dah selamat kena intebiu untuk degree program nanti. Nampak gaya, aku kena menghuni Puncak Perdana untuk beberapa tahun lagi. Bayangkan seksaan yang bakal aku tempuhi (lagi) lepas ni.

Kalau berjaya lepas level diploma ni, aku akan bakal mengikuti program ijazah sarjana muda dalam pengarahan teater di fakulti yang sama. Menurut kata guru-guru yang menemuramah aku beberapa minggu lepas, aku mungkin akan mengurangkan masa di fakulti paling-paling pun 2 tahun setengah. Itu kata mereka. Kita tunggu dan lihat sahaja lepas ni.

Kalau aku nak cerita balik pasal diploma showcase hari tu, aku rela berdiam diri kerana persembahaan itu bukanlah yang perlu dibanggakan, malah terlalu banyak komplikasi yang berlaku sepanjang persediaan serta semasa produksi teater tersebut. Malas nak cerita, lebih baik dipendamkan sahaja cerita lama itu.

Apapun, life has got to go on. Aku sekarang sedang mempersiapkan diri untuk satu lagi persembahan teater di Kuala Lumpur pada bulan Januari tahun depan. Pementasan ini juga adalah untuk tujuan amal kebajikan bagi Rumah Tasputra yang terletak di Ampang Hilir. Rumah kebajikan ini menempatkan beberapa kanak-kanak yang kurang upaya dan penjaga rumah tersebut adalah rakan baik kepada pengarah artistik yang juga mentor aku, Tn. Hj Kamran Ali. Pementasan ini pernah dipentaskan pada tahun lepas. Whoa! Willow, ya, itulah dia tajuk naskhah yang bakal dipentaskan di Oditorium DBKL pada awal tahun depan. Aku diberi tanggungjawab untuk menjadi salah seorang watak 'principal', Ya, ianya merupakan pementasan muzikal fantasi.

Di sini, aku kepilkan sekali ulasan atau laporan mengenai
showcase Lingakaran Kapur, atau tajuk asalnya Caucasian Chalk Circle, karya Bertolt Brecht, seorang aktivis teater Jerman yang terkenal suatu ketika dahulu. Karyanya yang paling popular adalah Mother Courage. Cek lah kat Internet sendiri okay.

Baiklah, cukup sampai di sini sahaja.

Michelle Obama to women: Do what makes you happy

2009-09-29T15:49:00.003+08:00

By DARLENE SUPERVILLE, Associated Press Writer Darlene Superville, Associated Press Writer – Mon Sep 28, 11:21 am ET
WASHINGTON – First lady Michelle Obama says women should do what makes them happy, a lesson she says she learned after realizing her two children, her husband and her physical health feed off of her good moods.
In an interview appearing in the November issue of Prevention magazine, Mrs. Obama discusses the meaning of good health, aging and her exercise, diet and beauty routines. She sat for the interview at the White House in late July.
Mrs. Obama says she learned "what not to do" from her mother, Marian Robinson, who now lives at the White House.
"She'd say being a good mother isn't all about sacrificing. It's really investing and putting yourself higher on your priority list," Mrs. Obama said. She said Robinson put her own two children first, sometimes to the detriment of herself.
"She encouraged me not to do that," Mrs. Obama said.
The first lady said there are many facets to good health — physical, internal, emotional, diet — and all are intertwined.
"Throughout my life, I've learned to make choices that make me happy and make sense for me. Even my husband is happier when I'm happy," Mrs. Obama said in her first interview with the women's health monthly. "So I have freed myself to put me on the priority list and say, yes, I can make choices that make me happy, and it will ripple and benefit my kids, my husband and my physical health."
"That's hard for women to own. We're not taught to do that," she added. "It's a lesson that I want to teach my girls."
Asked for a definition of happiness, Mrs. Obama said it's when daughters Malia, 11, and Sasha, 8, "are good and when my family is whole." She expressed relief that early in the year after moving from Chicago the girls came and told her they liked living in the White House.
"My happiness is measured against theirs. When they're in a good place, I feel really good," she said.
Mrs. Obama, who is 45 and appears on the magazine's cover, also said she has no fear about getting old.
"To me, with age, everything has gotten better," the first lady said.
She strives to be "on the cusp of being in the best shape that I can be" in, but has found she needs to work a little harder at it the older she gets. As a result, she has begun to incorporate more Pilates moves and stretching into her workouts to maintain flexibility.
Mrs. Obama also is working on balancing out her diet, which she said has "no absolute no's."
"Overall, it's good, but there are some great bakers" at the White House, she said, noting that pie is always available. "So for me, it's about setting up new boundaries. I had some challenges with that, but I'm balancing out."
The November issue of Prevention hits newsstands on Oct. 6.

Velvet Fingertips (Original)

2009-09-26T01:42:00.001+08:00

My latest obsession..Chris Cendana! I love this song so much! Enjoy this song ya!

Biskut Raya

2009-09-21T13:47:00.002+08:00

And so, I went to a grocery store yesterday, after a hari raya outing. I've had this strange craving for Danisa Butter cookies for the past few days, so I decided to get a tin of these goodies.

As I was about to hand the ringgit notes to the cashier, out of the blue, he smiled and said, "Ai kak! Raya sampai biskut raya habis nampak?"

I was like 'Raya with Danisa cookies?'...

Aku dan ECZEMA

2009-09-15T12:11:00.004+08:00

Sesiapa yang rapat dengan aku, pasti tahu bahawa aku menghidap satu penyakit. Penyakit ini dah lama, dari aku kecil lagi. Aku sakit ECZEMA, satu penyakit radang kulit. Professor Ches Skinner, pengarah 'showcase' diploma aku yang bakal berlangsung tak lama lagi pernah memberitahu, salah seorang daripada anaknya juga menghidapi penyakit kulit yang hampir sama dengan aku, cuma namanya berlainan: PSORIASIS.
Ramai yang kata ini penyakit kurap lah, kudis lah, macam-macam istilah yang aku dengar. Aku nak saja cakap kat mereka: KO TU TAK SAKIT, AKU YANG SAKIT! Semua berlagak jadi doktor!
Yang paling akutak tahan, segelintir mereka menjauhi aku sebab mereka ingat sakit aku ni berjangkit. Aku rasa aku seolah-olah jijik, persis pesakit AIDS.
Eczema sedikit sebanyak mempengaruhi emosi aku. Aku menjadi semakin kurang yakin dengan diri sendiri. Kadang-kadang aku terpaksa berpura-pura aku gembira dan normal macam orang lain.
Tetapi pada masa yang sama, aku bersyukur ada di antara rakan-rakan, sanak-saudara yang rajin memberi petua-petua untuk aku sembuhkan penyakit ini. Kesian aku tengok mak dan ayah aku. Mereka berdualah yang tak henti-henti tolong aku cari ikthiar macam mana nak sembuhkan aku.
Kerana Eczema jugalah, aku rajin mencari bahan-bahan bacaan atau maklumat mengenai penyakit ini. Rata-rata informasi yang aku dapat, mengatakan bahawa penyakit ini sebenarnya agak sukar untuk disembuh. Ia cuma boleh dikurangkan. Mendengar kenyataan sebegini, sudah tentu aku boleh rasakan aku hampir putus asa. Paling menggerunkan, kalau dibiarkan, Eczema boleh menjadi kanser kulit!

Kat bawah ni antara contoh-contoh rupa pesakit Eczema.

Gatal. Gatal. Sakit. Pedih. Itu saja yang mampu aku katakan!

Aku malas nak explain lebih detail lagi pasal penyakit aku ni, jadi, nak tahu lebih lanjut, sila klik kat SINI. (Wikipedia saja kali ni. Website yang lain macam leceh nak bukak!)

SATU

2009-09-07T16:41:00.003+08:00

Lemah langkahku

Hatiku sebak

Tatkala mereka laungkan 'SATU'

Macam nak gelak!

Ye ke? SATU?

Tak nampak SATU pada mata aku?

Kalau ye lah SATU, takkan kau bantah,

Takkan kau provok, bangkitkan amarah!

Satu? Satu? Ye ke SATU?

Bicara Filem bersama Dato' Mustapha Maarof

2009-09-02T21:14:00.005+08:00

Tarikh: 01.09.2009

Pukul: 9pagi

Tempat : Rumah sewa aku dan Bilik Kelas/Pejabat Datin Noraini di Fakulti.

Dialog 1

(Handset berdering)

Aku : Hello!

En. Hafiz : Fio, hari ni kelas kat ofis Datin Noraini. Bagitau budak-budak lain.

Aku : Okay ( tengah blur)...!

(Mandi cepat-cepat, pakai baju, rembat beg, capai kunci, terus keluar rumah dan ke kampus)

Dialog 2

(Dato' Mustapha bercerita tentang filem-filem zaman dulu dan pendapatnya mengenai industri filem zaman sekarang. Aku mengantuk. Tak lama kemudian..)

Dato' Mustapha : Ya, ada siapa-siapa lagi nak bertanya?

Aku : (Tiba-tiba tangan aku terangkat dengan sendirinya)

Dato : Ya?

Aku : Errr..Dato'...saya punya soalan ringkas saja. Sebagai pelakon, Dato' sudah tentu ada pengarah 'favorite'. Tak kira, samada yang pernah bekerja dengan Dato' atau mana-mana pengarah yang ada. Pengarah dahulu dan sekarang? Siapa ya, Dato'?

Dato Mustapha : Hmmm...bagi saya, pengarah yang pertama sekali memperkenalkan saya kepada industri perfileman, K.N Basker (entah betul tak aku punye spelling ni?)...lepas tu, yang generasi sekarang ni, saya suka Afdlin Shauki, terutama hasil kerjanya PAPADOM..

Aku : Okey, terima kasih Dato'.

Aku Grusha, Gadis Tukang Masak

2009-09-02T17:07:00.010+08:00

Nama aku Grusha Vashanadze. Aku belum lagi cecah 20 tahun, tapi rupa aku macam dalam lingkungan 40 tahun. Diulangi..RUPA aku sahaja. Kalau ikutkan, aku ni asal dari kepulauan Borneo. Lepas tu, aku menetap di satu tempat dipanggil Grusinia. Di sebuah istana di Kota Nuka. Tempat ini diperintah oleh seorang gabenor yang kaya-raya bernama Abashwili. Gabenor tu pada nama dia sahaja, padahal isterinya Natella yang menjadi dalang di sebalik pemerintahan kuku besi itu. Mereka dikurniakan seorang putera yang comel bernama Mikael. Cukup comel, tapi kesian. Pasal, dia cuma jadi 'aksesori' pelengkap keluarga Abashwili.

Aku bekerja sebagai pembantu tukang masak di istana ini. Tetapi kadang-kadang aku buat kerja orang lain jugak. Ye lah, aku tengah sibuk kat dapur, mereka panggil untuk cuci kain lah, tangkap ayam, itik, angsa, babi lah..ehh..maaf..Ingat aku ni Superwoman kah?

Namun, aku ni siapa nak persoalkan semua tu. Yang aku tahu, dengar arahan, tak boleh lawan cakap ketua atau siapa-siapa yang lebih berkuasa (konon) dari aku, buat kerja dan kerja dan kerja. Kalau bagi coklat Kitkat time aku rehat, takpe jugak. Merungut pun dalam diam. Makan dalam betul! Nak buat macam mana, padan muka aku! Dulu suruh belajar betul-betul, aku main batu seremban dan dam je kat kedai kopi belakang rumah aku.

Walaupun aku ni cuma seorang pembantu tukang masak istana, aku pun ada 'secret admire' jugak tau. Dia pun orang istana jugak..maksud aku..dia pun bekerja untuk Gabenor Abashwili, sebagai pengawal istana. Namanya Simon Shashava dari utara Kurtsk..I mean, utara Sarawak (arahan Pengarah!)

Dalam diam, rupa-rupanya Simon ada 'feel' kat aku. Wow! Yelah, aku tau, kami ni ibarat 'the odd couple'. Simon tak 'hensem' macam Rosyam Nor ke, Brad Pitt ke..tapi dia jugah gagah perkasa..Hebat! Pasal dia jaga Istana Nuka.

Tapi tak lama kemudian, Simon dihantar ke medan perang. Ada perang tau. Nanti la cerita.

Aku nak cerita lebih-lebih ni, nanti tak rasa tak best pulak. Jadi kalau nak tau lebih lanjut kisah hidup aku di Grusinia ni, jemput-jemput lah datang ke persembahan diploma kami ya!

Tajuk: Lingkaran Kapur

Arahan: Ches Skinner (Canada)

Pelakon: Pelajar-pelajar Semester Akhir Diploma Teknologi Kreatif (Teater)

Tarikh: 16 -18 Oktober 2009

Masa: 8.30pm (ada Matinee Show at 3pm)

Tempat: Dewan Bahasa dan Pustaka, Kuala Lumpur

P/S: Sila layari Facebook (Sepatu Ilham) untuk maklumat lanjut ya.

Saya tak hodoh, saya seekor monyet....

2009-08-31T19:20:00.002+08:00

Mentang-mentanglah Star Movies tengah tayangkan filem Planet of the Apes, maka aku pun menulis serba-sedikit tentang spesis yang hampir sama dengan manusia ni.

Tadi kat Facebook, salah seorang member aku catat kat FB Status dia:

" Don't think yourself as an ugly person, but think yourself more as a monkey...I'm a cute monkey!"

Wah! Begitu positifnya kawan aku tu. Aku siap tabik spring kat dia!

Satu Malaysia

2009-08-31T15:43:00.003+08:00

Hari ini Malaysia dah 52 tahun merdeka dari penjajah. Jadi, aku ke Giant Hypermarket di Seksyen 13, Shah Alam. (Apakah kaitannya dengan Hari Merdeka?)

Semasa aku keluar dari supermarket, aku terdengar ada sebuah lagu berkumandang. Yelah, supermarket mana yang takda muzik, kan?

Tapi aku sendiri tersengih seorang diri kat pintu keluar.

Hari ini adalah hari ke-10 umat Islam menunaikan ibadah puasa.

Lagu yang dimainkan adalah...jeng...jeng..jeng..

"Jingle bells, jingle bells,

Jingle all the way..."

Satu Malaysia sungguh...hehe!

SELAMAT MENYAMBUT HARI MERDEKA, MALAYSIA!

Just don't use HIS name to CONVINCE others!

2009-08-27T17:01:00.003+08:00

Waktu aku menulis post ni, aku masih lagi melawan perasaan marah yang tahap cipan selepas menerima berita tentang pertukaran tarikh diploma showcase kami Oktober ini. Selepas 3 tahun menimba ilmu seni teater di fakulti ni, aku berharap sangat yang keluarga aku terutama mak dan bapak aku hadir untuk menyaksikan persembahan aku di tahun akhir pengajian ni.
Tapi harapan tu berkecai selepas pihak pengurusan produksi mengumunkan pertukaran tarikh persembahan. Asalnya 9 Oktober hingga 11 Oktober 2009, lepas tu ditunda ke 16 Oktober hingga 18 Oktober 2009.
Mak dan bapak aku dah booking tiket flight dan hotel!
Aku macam kena tampar!
Adik aku (Priscilla) pulak sanggup ambil cuti tanpa gaji semata-mata nak tengok kakak dia berlakon teater..sesuatu yang dia sendiri tak pernah buat dalam hidup dia!
Masalahnya di sini, dahulu statement yang pihak atas produksi bagi:

CONFIRMED...INSYA-ALLAH!

Bukan apa. Aku agak kurang senang sekiranya sesorang itu memberi kepastian dengan menggunakan nama Allah sebagai penjamin! Aku yang Kristian ni pun faham, sebab dalam 10 Commandments pun pernah sebut:

THOU SHALL NOT USE GOD'S NAME IN VAIN

(kadang-kadang aku pun silap cakap..Oh! My God!)

So, my dear gentle readers, kat sini aku cuma nak bagi tau, kalau nak CONFIRM, cakap je CONFIRM! Nak libat nama Tuhan ni risiko dia tinggi, macam-macam hal boleh jadi tau. This is a BIG lesson for all of us.

Sememangnya, aku dah putus asa dan dah takde semangat sebab my dad semangat giler nak tengok showcase ni. Disebabkan kecuaian beberapa individu, maka KAMI yang ACCEPT the CONSEQUENCE!

Mungkin, ini petanda bahawa aku tak patut berada di sini lagi pada tahun-tahun yang akan datang. Maybe new life, new adventure awaits for me out there. We'll never know.

Sekarang aku perlu masa untuk cool down. Seriously, ini lagi teruk daripada majlis nikah yang dibatalkan (Chewah! Macamlah aku pernah bernikah sebelum ni. Choi!).

Crappy maybe, but hey, this is all I can say!

Perihal si Perro

2009-08-26T12:33:00.004+08:00

Pada satu pagi, beberapa jam sebelum kami mendengar rintihan amarah En. Hafiz akibat disiplin kami yang begitu 'high class' dalam kuliah, sahabatku Izmir @ Perro sempat berkongsi pengalamannya menghantar skrip karyanya ke 'somebody' dalam industri filem tempatan.

Aku tak boleh lah nak tulis balik apa yang dibualkan oleh kami berdua 100%, asalkan kata-kata kunci atau point-point fakta yang penting. Dialog yang lebih kurang tu macam ni:

Perro : Saya hari tu kan kak ada hantar skrip kat Puan M (let's just assume, shall we?)

Aku : Ye? Wow! Okay lah tu.

Perro : Ni nak citer la sket kan...tajuk citer saya 'Nangis'..

Aku : Okay..pastu?

Perro : Akak (Puan M) tu call la balik..

Aku : Wow! Bagus! Pastu pulak?

Perro : Die tanye ,"Skrip adik yang tajuk 'Langit' tu eh?" Saya pun jawab lah, "Bukan kak. Saya punye tajuk 'Nangis' kak". Pastu, die tanye balik , "Ye lah, yang 'Langit' tu lah kan?" Saya naik geram, last-last saya kata, "Kak, saya punya Nangis, Cry, kak, Cry, tau?" Akhirnye, ini yang klua dari mulut die, "Ye lah, SKY lah kan?"

Aku : Nangis means Cry, Langit means SKY...

(Pause kejap...last-last aku tak sedar aku dah gelak bagai nak rak atas lantai!)

Belle, the original cast(Garou, Daniel, Patric)

2009-08-23T19:34:00.001+08:00

One of the best STAGE MUSICAL tunes that I have ever heard so far! I must thank my lecturer-cum-vocal guru, En. Hafiz Askiak, for letting us to watch the recorded staging of this play during his lecture weeks ago. Super, duper NICE! Now, I'm in love with Garou hahaha!

TOPENG

2009-08-20T18:57:00.003+08:00

SHORT + SWEET THEATRE 2009

2009-08-17T13:04:00.006+08:00

Venue:

Kuala Lumpur Performing Arts Centre (KLPAC) Pentas 2

Date:

12 - 16 Aug 2009

Time:

8.30pm

With the lovely Datuk Faridah Merican, co-founder / owner of KLPAC.

The WAITING FOR GODOT TOO Team

(Shukri, Fasyali (the playwright & director) and Me)

Front-of -House displays

We made new friends with the actors involved in this event.

(Shukri, Mervyn, Eddy, ME (of course!) and Glamorique)

MORE PHOTOS OF THIS EVENT CAN BE VIEWED IN MY FACEBOOK. FEEL FREE TO ADD ME YA!

reeyalmadreed28@yahoo.com

Extendlah kalau berani!!

2009-08-14T13:48:00.002+08:00

Aku tengah marah lepas aku fikir balik tentang berita yang aku dapat semalam. Katanya, kampus nak cuti sebulan dua pasal H1N1. Berita yang satu lagi katanya, nak extendkan semua budak-budak.

GILA??

Cuti seminggu dulu pun aku kira dah boleh kacau sebahagian plan aku. Aku tak nak tangguh dah! Aku mesti habiskan sesi study kat kampus ni!
Pertaruhkan nyawa atau masa depan? Itu dah jadi persoalan. Aku macam dah tak siuman fikir balik semua tu!
Extend ye? OVER MY DEAD BODY!

All I want to do...

2009-08-08T11:48:00.008+08:00

There are times when I imagine myself sitting facing the sea in the evening. The waves roar and like wild horses, they race to the shores; the clouds parading slowly as the warm evening breeze runs through my hair. All I want to do is staring into the ocean as the mighty sun sinks into the water. All I want to do is to put every problem in my life into the sand. All I want to do is enjoy the quiet moment by the seaside.

Waiting for Godot TOO...

2009-08-07T19:43:00.004+08:00

Come and support FASYALI ya!

Tukang Masak vs Bini Gabenor

2009-08-07T18:14:00.004+08:00

Grusha Vashanadze, gadis tukang masak, dituduh kerana menculik Mikael (Michael) Abashwili, putera tunggal Georgi dan Natella Abashwili, iaitu pasangan yang memerintah sebuah kerajaan bernama Grusinia yang terletak di kawasan pergunungan Caucasia.

Georgi mati setelah negerinya ditawan oleh musuh dalam selimut, Putera Gemuk, manakala Natella, isterinya yang materialistik, berjaya melarikan diri bersama-sama harta dan beberapa orang suruhan istana.

Grusha, si gadis tukang masak di istana itu, ditinggalkan dengan Mikael dan mereka pula melarikan diri ke kawasan gunung yang berdekatan di mana saudara lelakinya, Lavrenti, tinggal bersama isterinya yang garang, Aniko.

(dipendekkan ceritanya lah....)

Grusha ditangkap oleh pegawai tentera dan dihadapkan ke mahkamah di atas tuduhan yang telah disebut awal-awal tadi. Natella, isteri gabenor yang ala-ala Imelda Marcos tu, ingin menuntut kembali Mikael.

(Ada udang di sebalik batu punya kes lah ni)

Nak tahu kesudahan ceritanya?

Tunggu 'update' yang akan datang ya.

DIALOG ORANG ITU

2009-08-06T18:48:00.003+08:00

A : Hoi! Ko nih...Takkan nak turun balik? 3/4 lagi dah nak sampai...Apa daaa!

B : Macam sial je! Aku nak stop lah macam ni....

A : Hish! Ko yang gatal nak buat benda ni dulu, dah nak sampai dah, ko jangan buat gila lagi wei..

B : Aku bingung, macam takde hasil je...

A : Sabar, buat je dulu, tak lama lagi, nak sampai dah tu...

ANAK

2009-07-31T11:56:00.007+08:00

Ini senarai nama-nama yang aku bercadang nak bagi kat bakal anak-anak aku satu hari nanti.
PUTERA

Aditya Elijah (untuk putera sulung)
Aryan Isaiah
Andhika Josiah
Arjuna Ezekiel

PUTERI

Aurora Nadine (untuk puteri sulung)
Aurelia Geraldine
Alma Noelle
Adelle Desiree

Au revoir, Storyteller...

2009-07-27T12:49:00.003+08:00

Aku macam tak boleh terima kenyataan apabila berita tu diumumkan semalam. Aku baru saja sebut nama arwah dalam kelas minggu lepas, masa tu aku dan rakan sekelas berbicara tentang contoh-contoh pelakon dan pengarah yang baik dan kurang baik. Aku akui aku peminat hasil-hasil kerjanya, tak kira filem, drama mahupun iklan komersial yang dihasilkan sempena Hari Merdeka atau Hari Raya setiap tahun.
Aku juga pernah berbual tentang arwah ketika pakcik dan makcik aku datang bertandang ke rumah kami waktu Raya Krismas tahun lepas. Topik perbualan kami pada malam Krismas tu seolah-olah membuka mata kedua orang tua aku bahawa bidang yang diceburi oleh anak sulung mereka ini juga satu bidang yang mampu mengubah persepsi dunia tentang kehidupan.
Aku juga antara ribuan pengikut blog arwah. Bukan sahaja arwah memberi informasi terkini mengenai hasil kerjanya, malah cara penulisan arwah amat aku kagumi. Tulisannya benar-benar terzahir daripada hatinya. Pandangannya terhadap isu-isu terkini di seluruh dunia tidak dibuat-buat dan begitu jujur sehinggakan ramai pihak yang tidak senang duduk dibuatnya. Antara 'blog post' terakhirnya turut menyentuh tentang kematian Teoh Beng Hock yang penuh kontroversi, baru-baru ini. Arwah menyatakan rasa kecewanya terhadap kematian pemuda Tionghua itu serta sesiapa sahaja yang terlibat dalam kes yang boleh dianggap boleh mengancam kedamaian negara.

Najib Razak (yes, our BELOVED PM tu) pernah menyarankan kat rakyat tentang konsep SATU MALAYSIA tidak lama dahulu. Sebenarnya, aku rasa bahawa arwah dah lama selitkan SATU MALAYSIA itu dalam hasil-hasil kerjanya selama ini. Aku difahamkan oleh sebilangan rakan-rakan aku bahawa pernah suatu ketika arwah dikecam oleh pihak-pihak tertentu kerana kononnya filem-filemnya tidak sesuai untuk ditonton oleh rakyat negara kita yang tercinta ini. Itu kata kawan-kawanku.

Usaha arwah tidak sia-sia sebenarnya. Hasil karyanya mendapat pengiktirafan daripada komuniti filem luar negara. Lihat sahajalah anugerah-anugerah yang beliau terima. Walaupun tidak setanding dengan jumlah piala-piala kemenangan yang ada kat kabinet rumah Datuk Siti Nurhaliza, sejujurnya aku katakan di sini, masyarakat luar lebih mengenali arwah berbanding penyanyi nombor SATU Malaysia itu. Arwah dah buktikan, tak mengapa kalau orang sendiri kurang mengenali diri, lagi baik kalau dunia luar yang mengiktiraf sumbangan dalam bidang yang diceburi. Pendekata, tak guna kalau jadi JAGUH KAMPUNG atau JAGUH REBAN SENDIRI.

Apapun, Tuhan Maha Besar. Aku terlalu hina untuk mempersoalkan ketentuan yang telah ditetapkan oleh-Nya. Pemergian arwah dianggap satu kehilangan besar. Mungkin Tuhan ada sebab kenapa Dia seru arwah untuk kembali ke pangkuan-Nya.

Puan Yasmin Ahmad, walaupun saya tak pernah bersua muka dengan anda, tetapi hasil karya anda telah menyentuh perasaan saya dan banyak mengajar saya tentang erti sebenar hidup yang harmonis dan lebih bermakna. We will miss you.

May the Great Lord bless your soul. Amen.

"Seandainya sebatang pohon menuliskan riwayat hidupnya, akan miriplah ceritanya dengan sejarah suatu bangsa..."
-Kahlil Gibran-

Cinta baru ku...TERBARU...

2009-07-18T15:21:00.003+08:00

Nama dia Kahlil. Berketurunan Lebanon. Dia dah lama wujud, tapi baru sekarang aku perasan tentang kewujudan dia. Tapi dah lama dah dia pergi. Romantis. Bukan dia, tapi hasil kerjanya. Tapi dia mungkin seorang yang romantis juga, kalau tak, masakan hasil kerjanya penuh dengan cinta dan sayang. Cinta pada Dia yang Esa, cinta sesama insan manusia, cinta pada alam semesta. Kini, aku sedang menikmati koleksi aforisma yang pernah dikarya Kahlil. Banyak. Tapi yang menjadi kegemaran aku adalah...

"MUZIK ADALAH BAHASA JIWA. MELODINYA BAGAIKAN HEMBUSAN ANGIN SEPOI-SEPOI YANG MEMBUAT DAWAI BERGETAR DENGAN RINDU"

Puas hati aku...

2009-07-17T16:03:00.002+08:00

Budak itu: Apa bongok?! Sape kate aku bongok? Hah?!! (seterusnya, bebelan itu semakin kurang difahami oleh kami semua...ending amarah si Budak itu tadi..pintu studio disepak macam bola!)

Aku: (senyum ala riang ria cuti sekolah) Puas hati aku...

The Memorial Service of the Era

2009-07-08T13:58:00.002+08:00

A girl, aged 11, surrounded by her uncles and aunts, spoke to the audience over her famous father's body.

"Ever since I was born, daddy had been the best father anyone could imagine...I love him so much..."

Then her little sobs broke into river of tears, she hugged her aunt, another famous figure in the pop music world.

And I got puffy eyes, too.

Salute!

2009-06-26T10:57:00.001+08:00

Dance forever now MICHEAL JACKSON!

2009-06-26T10:17:00.004+08:00

Hari ini merupakan tarikh rasmi aku menamatkan sesi praktikum (tapi banyak lagi kerja di studio ni tak settle lagi hehe! Nasib baiklah di fakulti sahaja, boleh gak aku sambung kerja tu sikit-sikit nanti).

Hari ini juga hari bersejarah. Satu dunia dah tahu RAJA POP @ MICHAEL JACKSON pergi buat selamanya.

Aku bukanlah peminat fanatik almarhum Jacko ni, tetapi aku membesar dengan muzik beliau. Aku membesar ketika dia menjalani beberapa siri 'plastic operation'; ketika dia mengahwini anak RAJA ROCK n ROLL, Lisa Marie Presley dan juga mantan jururawatnya sendiri (Debbie) yang juga ibu kepada anak-anaknya (yang bongsu sahaja anak daripada rahim yang lain).

Aku suka pada lagu BLACK and WHITE. Bukan kerana ia merujuk kepada najis sang cicak, tetapi ia menyentuh tentang adab manusia tanpa mengira warna kulit (UNFORTUNATELY, Jacko sendiri seolah-olah malu dengan warna kulitnya sendiri).

Aku sedang meniti usia 'pre-adolescence' ketika Jacko menggemparkan dunia dengan skandal mencabul kehormatan kanak-kanak. Aku masih berada di tahap 'culture shock' ketika melangkah ke alam sekolah menengah ketika Jacko dijemput oleh salah seorang putera Sultan Brunei untuk mengadakan persembahan di Brunei. Jacko pernah datang ke Malaysia dan pernah sekali salah satu 'shopping mall' di KL pada ketika itu ditutup hanya kerana Jacko ingin membeli-belah di situ (Satu tindakan yang kurang bijak, kerana aku rasa Jacko sendiri mampu untuk 'shopping' di tempat yang lagi 'kelas'. Harrods, you know what I'm saying?)

Itulah Jacko yang sangat 'wacko'. Gila-gila sang raja pun, satu dunia juga seolah-olah 'menyembah' hasil seni beliau.

Wahai Mikaeel, menarilah kerana kau dah bebas dari segala derita duniawi.

P/S: Aku masih ingat lagi, ketika aku berusia 13 tahun, lagu Jacko 'You Are Not Alone' sering berkumandang di radio. Apabila mak ayah dan adik-adik aku sedang tidur lena, aku berdiri di depan cermin dan memegang botol spray Shieldtox sambil membayangkan diri aku berada di depan jutaan penonton (dan aku nyanyikan lagu itu). Minta maaf sekiranya kedengaran seperti keterlaluan, tetapi ketika itu aku sedang mengalami kejutan budaya dan krisis diri setelah melalui transisi dari alam sekolah rendah.

Where to after this, Fio?

2009-06-18T16:53:00.004+08:00

And so, I've just realized that I may have committed another mistake. At this point of life, bila aku dah nak habis semester di fakulti ni, aku terfikir lagi. Ke mana aku nak pergi lepas program diploma ni. Kerja? Ada yang nak ambil pemegang diploma seni persembahan macam aku ni? Belajar? Kalau aku anak tunggal, aku 'carry on' saja...

Kadang-kadang daku terfikir...

2009-06-16T16:54:00.001+08:00

M.A.T.I.

2009-06-10T16:20:00.001+08:00

DEATH. Define DEATH. DEATH is the opposite of BIRTH. According to the 33-year-old New Universal Dictionary that belonged to Apak when he was a student back in the “groovy-yeah-baby” UK (and now I’m the ancient book’s proud owner…I’m pausing for a second), DEATH is the EXTINCTION of LIFE (duh!).
So, why do I speak of DEATH today? In my humble opinion, it is alright to talk about mortality once in a while. I mean, all of us are going to die one day (unless anyone of you out there, is a ‘god in concealment‘? I‘d rather not knowing about it at all). Before I proceed, allow me to clarify that I’m not promoting any stuff related to DEATH culture. Zip!
Most of us do visualize death as a vile issue to be discussed over a cup of tea. Go ahead and say out ‘DIE”, and I’m sure many would imagine floral wreaths, eulogies, pall bearers, coffins, candles, women with veils sobbing endlessly et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.
The first human death (let me re-check) ever recorded was..err..a guy named Abel. Yes, dear people, brother of Cain, son of Adam and Eve. Again, I’d like to make this topic as general as possible, and so I’ll include mortality among animals, plants, food (err..expiry date?) or anything!
I’ve seen many deaths in over twenty years of my being in this world. Family? My maternal great-grandfather passed away when I was 12, and my 9-year-old pet albino ‘kaloi’ fish (I christened it Sheera,) was found dead a day before the old man’s demise. And both deaths are hard to be erased from my head as both occurred during the full solar eclipse phenomena in Sabah, 1995.
Forward to 1998.The second death in my family was Apak’s mother, of whom we affectionately addressed as Nek Liko. She was about 64 years old when we lost her to heart failure and lung cancer (she was famed for her chain-smoking habit). I regret that I didn’t get to say ‘good-bye’ to her, even though I spent the night by her bed side, looking at my grandfather and my aunts tending her. I was in the toilet when Nek Liko breathed her last around 6 in the morning.
Apak’s second older brother, Uncle Matu, died unexpectedly about 10 months after Nek Liko’s passing. His death was caused by a terrible vehicle collision in the forest near Bakun area in Sarawak. Uncle’s death remained the most unforgettable in my mind because that was the first time I saw Apak cried like a little boy. I mean, he did not shed a single tear during his own mother’s funeral. That puzzled me the most.
About four years ago, nearly end of August, my family lost Nek Cila, my maternal grandmother. She succumbed to lung cancer and she hid the illness from us for a couple of years.
My family does not only consist of my parents and siblings. When I was a baby, my parents kept a dog for a pet and his name was Perkins. Since I do not have any memory of Perkins, let’s fast forward, shall we? The first real family dog was Lassie. But our Lassie wasn’t THE LASSIE you guys saw in the movies (you know, the famous canine of collie breed!). (Our) Lassie was just a cross breed that was found straying around our neighbourhood. A loyal friend to my family for almost ten years, Lassie died of heart infection shortly before my sister’s 20th birthday in September 2006. About more than a year before Lassie’s death, we had another pet dog who became Lassie’s companion and my brother called him Marco. A very playful local bred puppy, Marco loved to tease Lassie and would loyally escort Apak wherever he moved around the yard. Nevertheless, Marco’s life was short too, and he died of internal bleeding and infection; Marco was known for being stupid enough to swallow anything he’d find around the house. Currently, Apak is the proud owner of a two-year-old dark brown Doberman named Oscar. Still, deep inside I miss both Lassie and Marco very much.
Last Christmas break, I lost two family friends due to old age. I got the chance to visit one of them; Uncle Abong. A day after the visit at the hospital, Uncle Abong passed away peacefully in his sleep. As I returned to campus earlier this year, I received a shocking news from several classmates; a friend from our BEL class got involved in a road accident in Malacca. Putri Ade, a Jakarta-born girl who happened to be a Mass Communication major, suffered serious injuries and fell into a coma for weeks. Many hoped she’d recover. But that never happened, though. About more than 20 days in coma, Putri slipped away. I found myself numb upon receiving the news. The girl was just about to embrace adulthood. God must have cared for Putri so much that He called her to be back ‘home’ up there.
Recently my mother lost her elder brother (21st May 2009). Our late Uncle Masor succumbed to sudden low blood pressure when he was still in the middle of medical check-up in Kuching; he was worried if he’d get the deadly Influenza A (H1N1 virus). His sudden demise made me to think AGAIN and AGAIN about my real purpose of living in this world.
I’m going to be 26 this August and the phrase “ you have only ONE LIFE and ONE CHANCE to do all the things that you wish to do” sometimes do spark a lot of questions in my head. I am trying to enjoy this life that I have now. I cannot deny that my life could be ended anytime and anywhere.
I joked with my brother once, telling him that I’d like to make a special request if anything happens to me. Of course, he said, that was pretty stupid. I told him,” If I die, I would like to be cremated and I would like you to spread my ashes around the beaches in Miri.” His reply was,” Paloi (‘silly’ in Sarawakian Malay)! No one will dare to eat fish from our sea if I do that!”
Why cremate? I’ve heard a lot of cases of insufficient burial grounds in Miri (in other places as well). Why Miri beaches? The old Miri General Hospital was located near the beach and that was where my mother gave birth to me. I just want to be ONE with the soil and water of my BIRTHPLACE. How cool is that, eh?
Oh ya, about death in plants and other stuff, food life span maybe…well, just ignore them. I guess I’ll take back the word ‘GENERAL’ in this topic then. Sorry, guys!

Di Belakang Tabir BAULU IBU

2009-06-08T13:39:00.007+08:00

SHORT FILM PROJECT

Title: BAULU IBU

Written & Directed by: Alhafiz Burhanuddin

Date: 5 th June until 7th June 2009

Venue: Sg. Raba, Banting, Selangor

Saya cuma berperanan sebagai teman berbual Kartina Aziz dan juga penyibuk di lokasi. Thanks to En. Shah Razif kerana membawa saya ke lokasi shooting. Saya seronok dapat lepak dengan Aunty Tin. Haha!

Uncle Mok, rest in peace...

2009-05-25T13:26:00.002+08:00

A filial son...

A protective brother...

A playful but also helpful cousin and nephew

A loving husband...

A doting father...

A funny uncle...

A crazy and loyal friend...

SYLVESTER RAPAIEE 'APAI' KAWI

Born: 9th June 1958

Departed: 21st May 2009

Mak, it's your day TODAY!

2009-05-10T17:27:00.005+08:00

Mak, sorry for being such a tough cookie all these years.
You don't deserve such a stubborn daughter like me...

Happy Mother's Day, Mak.

I don't have to wait for VALENTINE'S DAY to share THIS, so GO AHEAD and READ...

2009-05-07T18:34:00.004+08:00

It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, but what is more painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let that person knows how you feel.

Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one so that when we finally meet the right person, we will know how to be grateful for that gift.

Love is when you take away the feeling, the passion, and the romance in a relationship and find out you still care for that person.

A sad thing in life is when you meet someone who means a lot to you, only to find out in the end that it was never meant to be and you just have to let go.

The best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch and swing with, never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you’ve ever had.

It’s true that we don’t know what we have been missing until it arrives, but it is also true that we don’t know what we’ve got until we lose it.

Giving someone all your love is never assurance that they’ll love you back. Don’t expect love in return, just wait for it to grow in their hearts but if it doesn’t, be content it grows in yours.

There are things you’d love to hear that you would love to hear from the person whom you would to hear them from, but don’t be so deaf as not to hear it from the one who says it from his heart.

Never say good-bye if you still want to try; never give up if you still feel you can go on - never say don’t love a person anymore if you can’t let go.

Love comes to those who still hope although they’ve been disappointed - to those who still believe, although they’ve been betrayed, to those who need to love, although they’ve been hurt before, and to those who have the courage and faith to build trust again.

It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone, an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone - but it takes a lifetime to forget someone.

Don’t go for looks; they can be deceiving. Don’t go for wealth; even that fades away.

Go for someone who makes you smile because it takes only a smile to make a dark day seems bright.

There are moments in life when you miss someone so much that you just want to pick the person from your dreams and hug him for real. Hope you dream of that special someone.

Dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go; be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all things you want to do.

Always put yourself in others’ shoes. If you feel that it hurts you, it probably hurts the person too.

A careless word may kindle strife; a cruel word may wreck a life; a timely word may level stress; a loving word may heal and bless. The happiest of people don’t necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way. Happiness lies for those who cry, those who have tried, for only they can appreciate the importance of people who have touched their lives. Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a tear.

The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; you can’t go on well in life until you let go off your past failures and heartaches. When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life so that when you die, you’re the one who is smiling and everyone around you is crying.

saya sudah kembali...

2009-05-07T18:24:00.001+08:00

02 May 2009

Resak Apartment, Puncak Perdana

Shah Alam

The first downpour on the second day in the month of May just hit Puncak Perdana as I was sitting in front of my laptop. Yes, finally Fio Kab’s back on track after being in seclusion for more than a month (or so). From the last post, I do admit that I still hold onto my grudge against the security guard. Whenever I bump into him in school, I just roll my eyes at him. If only I have the gut to stick out my tongue at him! Well, some of you guys out there may be wondering, why do I seem to have a hard time of letting that crazy old man go? After he summoned me and my classmate Syafinaz on that ’fateful’ morning, I began to ‘act good’, fearing that lunatic BBBB would be giving more and more ‘love letters’ in times to come. The week after the incident, I started to wear formal garb even though we did not have any formal classes, except for rehearsals in studios. Believe it or not, that crazy old man was not there! And the same thing happened weeks later on. For several weeks, I’ve been a TOTAL IDIOT myself, wearing ‘baju kurung’ and spent like, 5 minutes or so in the loo just to get changed! Oh yes, BBBB owed me really big time!

Okay, let’s talk about something else, shall we?

On the 30th April, I have ended (officially) my 5th semester and now a week from now I’ll be doing my practical sessions until end of June. 8 weeks alongside 4 of my classmates and one mentor. Who else? Hj. Mohamed Tharuwat @ Pak Tharuwat, of course. Unlike other students, the 5 of us will be trained only in school, making traditional headgears and other ornaments.

Deep inside I do feel grateful as this time I get to finish my studies here in UiTM. There are times I’d feel regret of not quitting TESL during my first year, that was way back in 2004! I could have been doing Masters degree in arts by now.

My other concern is that I am not sure where will I be heading to after obtaining a diploma from UiTM end of this year.

Sometimes I do think (again and again), was my action of leaving School of Education (later on I got officially dismissed) a smart one? Do I deserve to get compliments for braving my way to this harsh world of performing arts?

Once, I interviewed Susie Kukathas (yes, sister of Jo Kukathas), one of the founders of Petaling Jaya-based Instant Café Theatre. After the brief interview, Susie asked me, "Do you think that theatre industry in Malaysia will be BIG in the future?" Being so excited and a freshman in this field (hoping my response to be pleasant to her ears) , I answered, "Well, it’s not impossible, Ms. Kukathas". There was an eerie silence between us after the brief reply blurted out from my lips. She looked at me pensively for several seconds, then she grinned. This was what came out from her," Trust me, not in 10 years, 20 years or even 50 years, this field will not see the potential of going anywhere."

Until today, I keep on thinking about her jaw-dropping quotation. It did send me shivers whenever I recall that moment.

A Tribute To PAK GUARD UiTM Puncak Perdana

2009-03-16T13:14:00.005+08:00

Watak-watak:

Ketua Pak Guard @ BBBB
Fiona
Syafinaz
Pak Mat Misai Tebal @ Pak Guard Sporting

Di suatu pagi yang ceria...

Syafinaz: Kak Fio (tersengih) ada pak guard la.

Fiona: Lantak diorang lah, cepat, rehearsal dah nak start!

(Sampai kat tangga blok fakulti, sempat tegur Pak Mat Misai Tebal, kemudian BBBB yang mukanya bajet ganas tahan Fiona dan Syafinaz)

BBBB: Tau tak salah korang ape?

Fiona & Syafinaz diam tapi senyum, tahan marah.

BBBB: Ini hari Isnin, korang kena pakai baju KURUNG (Aik? Bukan FORMAL ke?)

Fiona: Kalau ye la kami salah, pak cik, especially saya ni yang duduk nyewa kat luar tu, patut kat gate kolej tadi dah kena tahan.

BBBB: ITU GATE KOLEJ. Surat dari dekan ade?

Fiona: Takde, tapi selama ni takde pun saya kena bagitau nak tunjuk surat semua-semua ni pak cik.

BBBB: Ahh! (Nada seakan-akan firaun Ramses III). Ko tengok sana tu, dekat notis board tu apa? (Nak tengok apa? Dah la notis board tu tak menarik, tak colourful!)

Fiona: Okay (Keluh, malas nak gaduh2 pagi2 ni). Bak sini la saman tu, pakcik.

BBBB: Hei awak cakap macam tu, boleh masuk HEP tau! (Makin tinggi nada dia!)

Fiona: Saya sainlah ni.

BBBB: Orang cakap baik2, ko balas macam tu plak, ni lah dia budak TEKA! (Yang ko tu, pakcik, tak sedar diri, tadi ko tegur aku macam nak sembelih aku on-spot!)

Fiona: (Ambil surat saman) Thanks pakcik! Banyak lah koleksi surat saman saya sekarang ni kat umah tu!

Declaring Mother Teresa a SAINT

2009-02-22T14:50:00.005+08:00

"Canonization (or, canonisation) is the act by which a particular Christian church declares a deceased person to be a SAINT and is included in the canon, or list, of recognized saints. Originally, individuals were recognised as saints without any formal process".

(www.wikipedia.com)

And so I received an SMS from a friend yesterday afternoon, that read:

"Passing this on - Mother Teresa is going to be declared a Saint within 3 hours in Rome. Your 3 petitions will be granted in her name, if you pray now. Send this to at least 5 people. Please pause for a while and make your petitions'.

Did I pass on the message? No. Why? What really matters here is we pray in silence, thank God, finally they recognized her OFFICIALLY as a saint. To me, she was already a saint when she was still around and will always be ONE forever.

Mama Teresa, I dedicate this rose for you, may the good Lord bless your soul and let perpetual light shines upon you.

Dey Munna Bhai, ap kya hai? Bappu said NO FIST-FIGHTING!

2009-02-22T12:45:00.004+08:00

Petang Sabtu semalam, tatkala aku 'blank' tak tahu nak buat apa, I turned on the TV, cun-cun jam 2pm macam tu.
Bukak TV saja, TV3 dah mainkan satu filem Bollywood. Macam biasalah kan, slot Panggung Sabtu. Aku layan saja lah, pasal dah penat mata aku melayan skrip monolog dan nota-nota untuk subjek Entrepeneurship (test hari Selasa ni, bosan tau, aku suka lecturer dia saja, sangat bersifat keibuan hehe!)
Tajuk filem tu Lage Raho Munna Bhai, aku tak faham maksud keseluruhan tajuk filem tu, yang aku faham Munna Bhai tu 'Abang Munna'.
Enthusiasm aku agak kurang sedikit tambahan pula hero filemnya bukanlah pilihan aku, Sanjay Dutt...aku big fan Big B (Amitabh Bachan), Anil Kapoor, Jackie Shroff dan Chunkey Pandey...old school beb! Shah Rukh Khan and Aamir Khan aku boleh tabik lagi, Hrithik Roshan depends pada filem apa yang dia berlakon (latest pun aku suke tengok Hrithik berlakon dalam filem Jodhaa Akhbar). And aku tak minat pada Salman Khan...except dalam filem Hello Brother, aku boleh terima sikit la!
Okay cukup dengan personal trivia aku tadi haha! Berbalik kepada filem ini tadi, macam biasa, Sanjay Dutt memainkan watak Muruli Prasad Sharma atau Munna Bhai, seorang samseng yang selalu diupah oleh Lucky Singh (tauke yang tamak) untuk membuat kerja-kerja tak elok. Munna Bhai ada side-kick partner yang bernama Circuit. Dalam kebengisan diorang ni, terselit perwatakan yang lucu. Munna Bhai yang brutal semacam ni actually ada soft-side jugak. Bila tiada kerja, Munna akan duduk di jeti tepi laut sambil mendengar rancangan favoritenya kat radio 'Good Morning Mumbai!', yang dikendali oleh Jaanvi, DJ yang bersuara lunak dan ceria. Dalam diam Munna jatuh hati pada Jaanvi, walaupun mereka tak pernah bersua muka.
Pada suatu hari, sempena memperingati hari kelahiran tokoh kemerdekaan India, Mahatma Gandhi (2 Oktober), stesen radio tempat Jaanvi bekerja mengelolakan satu pertandingan kuiz mengenai tokoh itu. Munna ingin menyertai tetapi satu benda pun dia tak tahu pasal latarbelakang Gandhi. Dengan mengupah beberapa orang cendekiawan untuk membantunya menjawab kuiz-kuiz tersebut, Munna akhirnya menang dalam pertandingan itu. Kemenangannya bukan sahaja membolehkan Munna dapat hadiah, bahkan ini juga merupakan peluang Munna untuk berjumpa dengan Jaanvi face-to-face.
Okay aku malas nak 'story' the whole thing, tapi apa yang menarik perhatian aku bila Munna berjumpa dengan Mahatma Gandhi, in person! Bukan pemyamaran, walaupun itu yang difikirkan oleh Munna. Gandhi menjelma dalam rohnya sendiri. Sedikit demi sedikit, Gandhi mengajar Munna untuk menyelesaikan setiap masalah yang ada dengan bijak dan rasional, bukan secara fizikal.
Aku sendiri adalah 'peminat' Mahatma Gandhi. Aku menyanjungi tokoh India ini. Prinsip hidupnya juga mengagumkan aku sendiri. Aku mungkin tak sanggup untuk ikut jejak prinsipnya dalam kehidupan harian aku. Memang beliau layak dipanggil Mahatma or 'Great Soul'.
Back in Miri, aku sendiri memiliki sebuah DVD filem yang bertajuk Gandhi, arahan Richard Attenborough pada tahun 1982, dibintangi oleh Sir Ben Kingsley (Gandhi). Through this film, I could feel the hardship Bappu (nama glamer Gandhi) had to endure, dari menjadi seorang peguam di Afrika Selatan hingga menjadi pejuang kemerdekaan India lebih dari 60 tahun dahulu.
Ada seorang lagi pejuang kemerdekaan Asia yang ingin aku tahu dan pelajari falsafahnya iaitu Jose Rizal dari Filipina. Setakat ini aku mendalami prinsip dan falsafah yang dipegang oleh tokoh-tokoh Malaysia dan Indonesia, sikit-sikit lah...hanya sekadar untuk pengetahuan, tak salah kan?

It's not GEMUK, it's COMEL!

2009-02-19T19:29:00.003+08:00

18th February 2009

10.45pm

Resak Apartment

Puncak Perdana

Tengah aku menulis post ni, aku sedang mengadap TV, pendekkan story, aku sedang menonton rancangan TV favourite aku yang terkini, ALLY.

Setiap minggu pengacara Ally Iskandar akan mengetengahkan topik-topik yang aku kira sangat sempoi dan menarik.

Tetapi topik pada malam ini tersangatlah INTERESTING kerana ianya berkaitan dengan diri aku sendiri.

Nak tahu apa tajuk topik tu?

GEMUK

Perkataan yang terlampau kerap digunakan dalam kehidupan manusia, selain daripada antonimnya, KURUS.
Ally pula menjemput runner-up Malaysian Idol edisi pertama iaitu Dina dan juga celebrity Chef Zam. Dua-dua sama comel dan lucu. Sebelum itu, aku menjangkakan Ally akan menjemput penyanyi favourite aku, Adibah Noor. Tersasar target makcik kali ni haha!

Bagi aku, isitilah GEMUK itu terlalu kasar, hina dan sinis bunyinya.
Aku prefer tembam, comel, bulat, gebu dan yang bertepatan dengan kesemua yang disebut tadi.
Aku pula sudah lama dikaitkan dengan isu ini.
Memang, daripada kecil lagi, aku dikenali kerana aku tergolong dalam kumpulan 'sihat' ini.
Sehingga kini, aku masih lagi COMEL (Please, sepertimana yang tellah aku katakan tadi, GEMUK tidak sesuai!)

Bukan aku tak pernah cuba untuk mengecilkan badan aku ni. So far, ada lah dalam 5 kali 'badan aku mengecil', tapi terus-terang aku katakan aku anggap saat-saat ke-slim-an badan aku ni hanya SHORT-TERM GLORY.

First time badan aku mengecut, adalah sewaktu aku berusia 13 tahun dan 14 tahun. Masa tu aku join Pengakap dan join kelas taekwondo sekali seminggu. Dalam masa setahun, aku boleh memakai saiz M dan juga S! Wah, memang best lah!
Tetapi pada usia 15 tahun, aku agak tertekan dengan PMR dan juga..ehem..hal berkaitan dengan boyfriend (sekarang BEKAS boyfriend dah). So I turned to food for comfort *sigh*!
Lepas aku settle dengan PMR, dan pada masa yang sama aku pun 'clash' dengan dia tadi, aku perasan badan aku 'comel' balik. Aku sambung balik kelas taekwondo selama setahun, dapat la balik figura kesukaan aku tu. Time SPM pulak, bapak aku suruh aku quit taekwondo pulak (aku sempat belajar sampai ke tahap blue tip, kalau tak silap, sayang kan?), apa boleh buat, sebagai anak sulung, aku tunaikan saja permintaan bapak aku tu.
Sepanjang zaman SPM aku, percaya atau tidak, berat badan aku shot up sebanyak lebih kurang 15 kilogram daripada berat badan aku time aku masih join kelas martial arts tu! Terkejut aku dibuatnya!
Mana tidaknya, time tension dengan SPM, makanan bertindak sebagai 'anti-depressant' aku.
Selepas dapat result SPM aku yang tak seberapa tu, pada usia 18 tahun, mak aku pulak cuba kurangkan 'kecomelan' aku. Daripada sup tauhu kosong, ayam kukus, sayur kukus, nasi yang tak sampai suku amaun nya, air milo tak bersusu and lots of mineral water, plus, brisk walking every evening, dalam masa 3 bulan, aku 'kecil' balik. Terasa saham naik time tu hahahaha!

Tapi lepas tu (dah namanya manusia kan) aku tak dapat tahan nafsu makan aku, aku 'comel' balik.

Fast forward, paling last aku kurang 'comel' adalah time sebelum aku masuk belajar di fakulti

sekarang, sebab tengah menunggu keputusan permohonan ke UiTM, aku bekerja part-time sebagai sales assistant di Vincci Store di SACC Mall kat Shah Alam.

Masa kat fakulti lama dulu (Fakulti Pendidikan) pernah jugak badan aku kecut, sampai ke tahap muka aku cekung macam mangsa perang saudara kat Namibia, katanya.
Agaknya, sekarang ni aku 'comel' balik pasal aku gembira, rasanya, walaupun sudah 2 tahun setengah aku penat melayani karenah budak-budak kelas aku yang aku kira boleh dibandingkan dengan kanak-kanak tadika sebelah kampus aku. Bukan saja aku nak mengutuk, tapi itulah kenyataan yang aku hadapi kat sini sekarang.
Back to the topic tadi, aku sudah mula terima keadaan aku yang comel ni, hajat nak kurus tu, tipulah kalau aku nafikan.
Satu saja aku kena ingatkan diri sendiri dan kepada sesiapa sahaja yang tergolong dalam kategori saiz ni, sekiranya nak kecilkan saiz anda, biarlah dengan cara yang betul dan sihat. Aku yang comel ni pun kena maintain jugak, aku kena usahakan supaya aku tak jadi lebih comel. Hidup biar selesa dan sihat, bukan nak cantik luaran sahaja.
Kurang confidence pun turut jadi isu bagi orang-orang comel tau. Sekarang ni, persepsi negatif pasal orang comel dan semakin pudar tau. Jangat ingat yang slim-melim tu saja nak conquer dunia. Like it or not my dear ladies out there, terimalah STATEMENT ni, BIG GIRLS DON'T CRY and BIG GIRLS ARE REAL WOMEN! Fret not, COMEL SIZE COMRADES! Woohoooo!!
Nak comel mestilah bertepatan, nak kurus pun kena pada tempat dan gaya. Media massa sekarang saja nak lariskan jualan produk! Persetankan EKSPLOITASI RUPA PARAS!

Lantaklah kalau post aku kali ini menampakkan aku seperti seorang yang penuh agitasi dan hala kiri sikit, but apa boleh buat, RADICAL IS ME!

This photo was taken on my 14th birthday! Pipi maintain tembam, body jer kurang comel time tu...

Macam tak percaya saja, kan? That's me with my friends. Masa ni aku masih belajar di Fakulti Pendidikan, 2005. Tinggal kenangan dah. Hehe!

HAIKU Si Yatim Piatu Gaza

2009-02-16T19:48:00.004+08:00

Ku buka mata

Hilang

Mimpi musnah

Mana ibuku?

Mana ayahku?

Aku takut

Zionis

Menggila

Mengganas

Saudaraku

Kau bedil

Tiada simpati

Ku genggam

Tanah

Gaza berdarah

Jatuh

Airmata mengalir

ditemani doa

Langkahku

Lemah

Tidak berdaya

Aku

Mereka anggap

Harapan

Impian

Gaza

Agar bangun semula

Ku pinta

Tuhan

Hukum mereka

Aku

Si yatim piatu

dari Gaza

Puncak Perdana, Shah Alam

14 Februari 2009

After MAJALAH 3's documentary on Gaza War

Shocked, dismayed and disgusted!

2009-02-12T18:22:00.002+08:00

Situation A (In a studio)

Lone Ranger: One of the shows may have the possibility to be cancelled tomorrow. I guess it's going to be the traditional dance drama.

Jenab Kerinting: Alah, biarlah dramatari tu. Leceh jer! (Trying to act cute, but the act irritated the Lone Ranger)

Lone Ranger: Lantak kau lah, bukan kau yang menari pun! Apa hal ko nak bising pulak?

Jenab Kerinting: (Rolled her eyes back and ignored the leader’s remark)

Situation B (At a luncheon)

Mister H: Whoa! Willow is going to be re-staged again.

Lone Ranger: That’s great! I’ll join if I have the chance to do so.

(Call from the playwright himself : Guess you must’ve got the news from Mister H already, we’re going to have an audition at your place sometime next month!)

Lone Ranger: Yay! Willow’s back! Bulan depan ada ujibakat kat sini!

Meon Sepet: Tak payah kak oi! Buat teater Melayu je, tak payah susah-susah audition teater omputeh tu. Mana ada budak-budak nak pi ujibakat teater lagu tu!

Lone Ranger: (Suddenly throbbing pain within her emerged, glared at Meon Sepet for a while, in her mind, she was already imagining, smacking the guy’s face with a plate!)

90% of the dialogues above, actually happened in the past couple of days. Why am I saying 90%? That’s because I didn’t use real names to describe the people mentioned here.

Itulah dia gambaran sebenar budak-budak batch aku. Kesian kan mereka ni?

Jenab Kerinting memang wujud, and bagi pendapat aku, dia adalah seorang manusia yang agak susah untuk bangun sendiri. Aku dah lama perhati dia. Sudah acapkali aku bertelagah dengan dia, aku boleh relax lagi.

Aku adalah ‘orang jahat’ bagi dia dan rakan-rakan baiknya itu.

Yang si Meon Sepet pulak, dia juga wujud. Aku kesian kat mamat ni. Dah lama aku tengok ke-poyo-an dia dalam kelas mahupun mesyuarat kumpulan. Penuh kontroversi jugak lah dia ni.

Aku bukan judgmental dalam hal ni, ‘perjuangan’ aku sendiri pun tak habis handle lagi.
Cuma aku jadi bisu, apatah lagi terkejut, tergamam dengan statement serta reaksi kedua manusia tu tadi

L.O.V.E. di mata Fio Kab...

2009-02-08T20:28:00.004+08:00

Terlalu subjektif makna CINTA, hingga lidah aku kelu nak menyebut perkataan cinta...Ewah! Ayat tak tahan, macam dalam novel-novel cinta Melayu.

You must be wondering at the moment, why, out of sudden, aku 'gatal' semacam nak berceloteh tentang cinta dan kasih sayang.

Agaknya, lebih kurang seminggu dari sekarang, seluruh dunia akan menyambut Hari Valentine.

Perayaan yang asalnya disambut oleh umat Kristian mazhab Katolik (sekarang tak silap aku, kami dah tak anggap ianya perayaan yang penting lagi dah), telah disambut secara komersial, macam Krismas.

Terlalu komersial sehinggakan ramai yang menganggap Hari Valentine hanya disambut oleh pasangan kekasih yang hangat bercinta katanya.

Adalah sesuatu yang cliche jika aku katakan hari 'special' ni juga untuk semua orang, untuk mak, ayah, adik-beradik, kawan-kawan, kucing, anjing, ikan emas dalam balang kaca tu. Orang yang kurang upaya juga berhak untuk menyambutnya.

Mungkin yang keluar dari mulut aku ni adalah pendapat seorang insan yang agak lama tidak 'berpacaran'. Aku akui juga statement jatuh maruah itu (haha! Sadis!)

Dah masuk 10 tahun aku bergelar 'single lady'. Aku sebenarnya tidak menganggap ini sebagai satu masalah mahupun dilemma.

Tetapi semenjak beberapa minggu kebelakangan ini (actually berbulan dah, cuma aku buat bodoh memanjang) ramai di antara rakan-rakan aku bakal menamatkan status bujang diorang. Malah ramai yang dah nikah dan sekarang nak masuk fasa hidup yang seterusnya, jadi mak bapak budak.

Aku dah lebih dari suku abad usia aku, kalau zaman nenek aku dulu, agaknya anak aku dah berderet dah. Tapi itu dulu.

Semalam kawan serumah dengan aku, Ayu, dengan segannya bagitau kat aku dia dah nak bertunang bulan Jun ni. Syukurlah, bakal tunang dia pun orangnya baik.

Aku pernah diaju soalan-soalan yang berkenaan dengan nikah ni.

Aku sempat berborak dengan senior merangkap kawan dan fellow blogger, Lan Pujangga Lagenda, petang tadi kat kafe kampus.

Sambil lepak dan berkongsi cerita update kat kampus, terselit hal pasal nikah-nikah ni. Kami macam dah sepakat mengeluarkan statement bahawa pada waktu ini, golongan 'dinosaur' seperti kami ini anggap hal sedemikian macam remeh semacam.

Apa? Kami seperti pernah kecewa? Itu biarlah menjadi rahsia, bak kata the current Mrs. Khalid Jiwa.

Brutal-brutal aku ni, aku pun sensitif jugak tau. Masih mencari lagi The One tu, terma MR. RIGHT tu macam tak kena dengan aku. Aku mengaku yang berapa banyak kali dah SILAP ORANG, serik tu memang ada.

Cinta pada Tuhan, aku tak boleh reject DIA, FOREVER until aku ngadap balik depan DIA one day nanti...

Cinta pada mak bapak, mereka yang bawak aku ke DUNIA ni, jaga aku, asuh aku jadi diri aku sekarang...

Cinta pada adik-beradik aku, kami berkongsi genetik yang sama, teman untuk berbual dan bergaduh kat rumah...

Cinta pada kerabat lain dan sahabat, mereka menjadikan hidup aku lebih bermakna, jahat baik mereka juga membentuk perwatakan aku...

Ada satu lagi ruang CINTA dalam diri aku ni sebenarnya...

Aku memang dah sedia nak terima SIGNIFICANT OTHER kalau dah sampai seru nanti.

Kita tunggu dan lihat.

Tak payahlah hensem macam bintang Hollywood ka, Bollywood, asalkan cukup sifatnya sudah memadai...

Aku tak harapkan lagak romantik ke ape ke, janji dia boleh jadi 'bestfriend' aku selain menjadi pasangan, suami dan bapa kepada bakal zuriat aku nanti

Cukup lah dia seorang yang setia, yang boleh membimbing aku menjadi lebih baik.

Cukup lah jika hanya dia sahaja yang akan ku nikahi sepanjang hidup aku nanti...

Di mata aku sekarang, ayah aku adalah contoh terbaik untuk aku jadikan sebagai guideline untuk 'fasa hidup' yang satu ini nanti....

L.O.V.E. di mata aku...

Sleeping Beauty...

2009-01-30T17:59:00.006+08:00

There's nothing wrong with taking a short nap in class, tapi agak bahaya jika anda tidur dan ada rakan-rakan wanita berada di dalam kelas, lebih-lebih lagi mereka yang jenis bawa alat mekap ke kelas!

Anda Faham tak?

2009-01-30T17:34:00.002+08:00

Seeking MELANAU in ME

2009-01-30T15:36:00.008+08:00

Date: 29th January 2009

Venue: Starbucks, Sunway Pyramid, Subang Jaya.

Time: Around 8.30 onwards

Uncle GT: Fiona, since kaau in this field of study, diak kaau subet cerita drama pasel liko kelou itou. Kak un PGL adep un nilak a'a bah.

Fiona: Cerita pasel liko melanau? Ako penah pe-ta'ah cerita Tugau un keman lo tebusou jahak tipou lahabei, Uncle. Idak un versi cerita lou ien. (gelak ala-ala segan gitu!)

Uncle GT: There are plenty of stories about our people, you know. Penah un kaau ta'ah kisah
Pengiran Dipa jahak Pengiran Matusin?

Fiona: Pengiran? Minou hal sau liko Brunei un piyau tou, pengiran kawak agei ien. (Hairan)

Uncle GT: Mun gui un te-u ji liko telou itou, idak angai connections telou jahak liko kik, bruneians are part of them. Culture telou idak sama...Anyway, Pengiran Dipa ien...

Fiona: Dipa? Uncle, you mean (buat gesture tangan: ular tedung) itou ka?

Uncle GT: Yes, that dipa. If kaau kenah subet into drama one day, diak angai ngak, you can show the world how interesting budaya liko telou.

Fiona: (ambik buku nota dan pen dari beg) And then Uncle?

Uncle GT: (Muka dah syok untuk bercerita) Liko telou itou aneng bei kaitan jahak Brunei. Adat telou aneng idak tutui lou ien. Tapi mun kaau dig more on this, we're way back to the Polynesian islands.

Fiona: Oh ya, bei Apak dengah lau ien. (keep on scribbling, eyes on Uncle GT)

Uncle GT: Later go find "Kon-tiki Expedition" online, and read it. Ako one time read journals on how the early Melanau people migrated throughout Pacific Oceans. Yay! We're from Pacific! Haha!

Fiona: Err...Uncle, how about the 'theory' saying bei jalak liko gak Mindanao islands gak Philippines ginan called Maranao; the name Maranao means 'Melayu Danau'. Lou ien keman jekan wak hampir sama jahak kinah telou, jekan pahai, mun telou jekan tahai, betul kan?

Uncle GT: You see, our nenek moyang migrated from the Polynesian side like hundreds of generations ago, they were called Sea-farers, inou tibah telou...lanun...tapi bukan maksud lanun as in pirates, no! Lanun dagen konteks itou, aneng travel gak sea, pinyieng new settlements. One interesting fact, these lanuns guna stars as compass while at sea...

Fiona: Owh okay, okay. (still jotting down)

Uncle GT: (Sipping his latte) Oh ya, speaking of the Jerunei (funeral pyre for Melanau aristocrats and royals)...bei similar to those of Incas in South America, you know..

Fiona: (stop and stare...no, no, bukan lagu One Republic tu...I stop writing notes for a while)

Uncle GT: Idak sangka jerunei existed because of Tugau. Just to straighten up the pillars, they need slaves, young children precisely, to be buried under the pillars. Actually, the Incas too did the same human sacrifice.

Fiona: Whoaa...ako pun fikir Tugau wak mengasel adat jerunei ien...Dalat people call it klidieng, kan? (sambung balik tulis)

Uncle GT: One day, you have time, go back to Mukah and Dalat. Bei jelaweh alai itou knows more about the myth I told you just now. Your generation idak wak enda ta-o gak kisah-kisah dana lahabei. His name is Thomas Tudin, enda bei jauk lebok sien keman lebok Uncle gak Mukah ien.

Fiona: I guess, even my parents pun enda ta-o kawak. Thanks Uncle, mun Uncle debei pedengah gak ako creta itou, aneng ako pikir creta Tugau un.

Uncle GT: Work on it ya, try make money hehe! (Continues to sip his latte)

The Quest to search for MELANAU in ME begins...

Say LAH whatever you want to say, I DON'T care...Keep on TUDING JARI!

2009-01-27T13:33:00.006+08:00

Funny. Hairan. Aku gelak sendirian. Aku fikir balik. Aku gelak kecil lagi. Funny, really funny!

Aku terpegun dengan SEGELINTIR manusia yang bersifat JUDGMENTAL terhadap pendirian aku, pegangan hidup aku, kepercayaan aku, pendapat aku. Bak kata Shamsul Ghau-Ghau, ape-ape ajelah!

Aku cakap yang itu ini, aku sokong itu ini, dah jadi masalah penyakit mata dan hati bagi beliau-beliau ini.

I don't deny that kekadang aku pun terer jugak bab-bab mengkritik orang ni, jaguh dan juara kot!

Blame it on this: KITA MANUSIA MEMANG MACAM NI!

Alim ke tak alim, itu soal lain.

Malas aku nak berkias-kias kat sini.

Sudah menjangkau suku abad aku menyedut udara di atas planet yang paling cantik dalam alam semesta ini, aku sudah puas menjadi saksi pertukaran kuasa sang kalifah dari hand ke hand.

Aku akui aku tak bijak menyusun kata, what more to scoop my opinion out from my brain and share it with my fellow earthlings. Aku ni 'budak' baru nak belajar rasanya. Hingusan? Takpe, aku ada tisu ni, aku boleh lap sendiri.

Tapi aku dapat rasa EGO aku mengamuk jika soal peribadi ku lebih-lebih lagi yang berkaitan dengan agama yang aku anuti menjadi medan debat sesetengah pihak.

Pegangan dan falsafah ku turut diperbincangkan, hingga aku sendiri rasa tercabar dari dalam; aku pun sedikit sebanyak melakukan perkara apa yang mereka lakukan juga.

Tiada maksudku untuk timbulkan PROVOKASI, DEBAT...aku lebih rela DIAM, ya lah, semua nak cakap, siapa yang nak dengar akhirnya?

Aku dulu juga seorang yang agak 'kepoh', rasanya lagi teruk daripada Mat Kepoh kat rancangan TV3 dulu, Melodi versi Kak Ogy Daud yang over suam-suam tu.

Ada point-point tertentu dalam hidup aku membuat aku CHANGE sedikit sebanyak sifat-sifat ku.

Minda yang belum terbuka sepenuhnya antara faktor-faktor aku bertindak sedemikian. Naive, keliru, itu semua biasa terjadi. Aku juga daif dari segi pengalaman hidup, soal rohaniah, apa lagi harta duniawi....

(eh, sorry aku terbawa-bawa sikit..)

Aku sokong PRESIDEN BARACK OBAMA, beliau pulak dipersoalkan, diragui kerana kenyataan beliau sokong ABORTION dan macam-macam lagi anasir jahat.

Agaknya aku dah bosan melihat USA diterajui oleh Mat Salleh Putih. Oh, tidak, aku bukan racist. Jangan risau.

Aku sedar, kehadiran presiden kulit hitam yang pertama negara Uncle Sam itu, ibarat Messiah yang SEMENTARA kepada rakyat Amerika setelah dunia menjadi saksi kepada segala kemusnahan yang diakibatkan oleh anak laki-laki kesayangan Pak George Bush, si Walter tu.

Perkara ini pernah ku tanyakan pada seorang pensyarah jemputan fakulti aku yang se-negara dengan Obama; beliau juga berpendapat Obama hadir sebagai 'pemulih keadaan', for now.

Aku, pada pendapat beliau-beliau tadi, adalah seorang penganut agama yang menentang amalan jahat itu.

Aku tak patut cakap aku sokong Obama.

Tell me, ada tak agama dalam dunia ni yang nak pengikutnya buat benda-benda macam ni?

Aku takkan masuk sangat bab-bab agama ni, pada kali ini, takut aku dan pihak lain makan hati pulak nanti.

Apa yang aku rapu-kan di sini adalah kesan daripada hasutan mereka yang mengamuk.

Aku sokong ecumenism bukan saja-saja, aku ada sebab aku sendiri, tetapi buat masa ini aku tidak ada niat untuk menjelaskan lagi situasi aku ini, nanti jadi makin keruh. Aku dengar pendapat yang lain, melihat bukan sahaja dari kaca mata aku, perspektif lain juga diambil kira.

Aku bukan kaki politik, aku cuma berminat melihat cara para pemimpin mengetuai masyarakat dan negara masing-masing.

Pendek kata di sini, aku cuba untuk tidak menjadi a ONE-SIDED thinker seperti sesetengah orang.

Selepas ini, aku mengagak post aku kali ini mungkin akan membuat beliau-beliau yang tertentu terkesima, terkejut, terasa, ter-apa sajalah. Tuding lah jari anda kepada aku! Kerana SATU jari akan menuju kat aku, EMPAT balik pada anda juga. Muahahahaha!

Aku hargai pendapat anda, wahai beliau-beliauku, namun sebelum beri cermin kepada orang lain, ambillah cermin sendiri dan tengok refleksi anda sendiri.

Aku tak pinta debat mahupun provokasi mana-mana pihak.

Beliau-beliau sekalian, cakaplah apa yang kau ingin cakapkan, kerana itu hak mulut dan bibir anda sendiri dan aku sendiri tak kisah sangat.

Terima kasih kat BELIAU-BELIAU yang berkenaan kerana telah sanggup membuang masa anda di blog aku yang hina-dina ini.

P/S: Suasana yang tegang dan serius adalah punca kemusnahan keharmonian dunia. Renungkan. Change, change, change! :)

From READERS DIGEST, January 2009 Issue

2009-01-19T11:31:00.003+08:00

Kat mukasurat 21 magazine itu, tertera:

FACE IT: YOU LOVE YOURSELF

(Take a look at my FACEBOOK page, aren’t I gorgeous, glamorous and successful?

That particular short article caught my attention, so it read:

“Facebook, the online networking phenomenon, has 100,000 MILLION users with pages full of photos and updates on its users’ latest endeavors. But these pages can reveal more than first thought - it can expose Narcissists.

Researchers at the University of Georgia asked untrained observers to look at the pages of 130 Facebook users (Hopefully, I was not one of them!). Glamorous self-portraits, long lists of friends (Ouch!) and self-promoting “WALL” comments all indicated an unhealthy level of vanity (Phew! I’m not, DEFINITELY, not ONE of them!).

Study author Keith Campbell says, “Narcissists are using Facebook the same way they use their other relationships: for self-promotion, with an emphasis on the quantity over quality.”

Jeeeezz…what about FRIENDSTER and MYSPACE then? Aren’t they same as well?!

My advice for Facebook people:

PUT UP A PHOTO OF YOU WEARING A MASK OR JUST PAINT YOUR FACE!
That’s fair and square, people, fair and square!

Is President Obama’s “CHANGE” realistic?

2009-01-19T11:15:00.004+08:00

Pagi tadi aku menonton rancangan Malaysia Hari Ini (MHI) di TV3, dan isu perlantikan Barack Hussein Obama Jr sebagai Presiden Amerika Syarikat yang ke-44 esok (20 Januari) diketengahkan.

Antara soalan yang diajukan oleh Mazidul, sang pengacara kepada seorang profesor berbangsa India dari UKM (namanya K.S Nathan, kalau tak silap aku):

Adakah laungan CHANGE Presiden baru itu REALISTIK pada pandangan orang ramai?

Tak perlulah aku jot down apa jawapan profesor itu ya.

Pandangan orang ramai = PANDANGAN KORANG lah tu kan.

Bagi aku pula, aku percaya presiden baru itu mampu membawa CHANGE, bukan sahaja kepada Amerika Syarikat, bahkan kepada seluruh dunia.

Pada masa yang sama aku turut risau, jika Obama tidak mampu merealisasikan CHANGE yang telah dia sebutkan pada kempen pilihanrayanya.

Maklumlah, POLITIK ini kotor. Kau taburkan janji, kau tak dapat kotakan janji kau, bak kata PAHLAWAN RENTAP time dia serang tentera Rajah Brooke di Sarawak dulu:

PARAI NUAN! PARAI NUAN! PARAI NUAN!
(Tanyalah kawan-kawan kau dari Sarawak apa maksud PARAI tu okay).

I’m keeping my fingers crossed for Presiden Obama. Aku berharap CHANGE yang dijanjikan olehnya akan memberi HOPE kepada USA dan sejagat.

Aku ingin Obama bagitau Zionis kejam yang sial, p*****k, bajingan, tolol itu, STOP THE BLOODY WAR IN GAZA, LEAVE THE PALESTINIANS ALONE, FOR GOD’S SAKE!

Aku ingin Obama bawa balik tentera-tentera Amerika Syarikat yang berpengkalan di mana sahaja di dunia ini.

Aku ingin Obama pulihkan ekonomi dunia yang semakin parah; dia janjikan polisi ekonomi yang baru. Bukan sahaja dunia yang menderita, malah setengah juta rakyat Amerika menganggur (laporan minggu lepas).

Aku ingin CHANGE!

P/S: Aku sendiri mahu CHANGE untuk diri aku;

1) tak nak malas buat assignment (walaupun sakit M aku agak menjadi-jadi)

2) CHANGE my sedentary lifestyle (Pn. Umi dah bising: CUBALAH EXERCISE SIKIT, KAU TU DAH NAK DIPLOMA SHOWCASE NEXT SEMESTER)

3) kurangkan marah aku (harap-harap ANGER MANAGEMENT technique yang aku belajar time cuti hari tu berkesan).

Banyak lagi CHANGEs yang aku nak.

Oh ya satu lagi:

AKU NAK RAKAN-RAKAN SE-BATCH AKU UBAH PERANGAI BODOH SOMBONG diorang. CHANGE, MAN, CHANGE!

The Most Unpredicted Victory so far!

2009-01-19T11:05:00.003+08:00

12.30 am (19 January 2009)

Half an hour ago they have announced the winner for TV3’s Grammy-like awards, 23rd Anugerah Juara Lagu (AJL). The Song of the Year award went to…oh, well…MEET UNCLE HUSSEIN!

Yes, the indie band, of course! Yes, the one whose debut number LAGU UNTUKMU was introduced through 8TV’s teenage serial, KAMI.

Before that, Malaysia’s comeback Superguy, Faizal Tahir, won three awards namely The Best Performance, The Best Vocal and The Ballad Category and I was expecting SAMPAI SYURGA to win The Song of the Year award.

I was left AGHAST when Cheryl Samad, Ally Iskandar and Faizal Ismail heralded MUH (Meet Uncle Hussein) as the overall champion, instead of Mr. Superman!

My housemates, Ayu, Nadiah and Diana cried joyfully..sheesshh!
I know! 3 against 1!

Okay, on the bright side of it, MUH’s victory brought INDIE music to another level.

It has been ages since I last fond of indie music (Yeah! All I know were OAG, Intoxicated, Juliet the Orange, Butterfinger and again OAG! I‘m OLD SCHOOL maaa…).

Lan (bukan Lan Pujangga Lagenda), the lead vocalist of MUH, no doubt, did a great job while on stage.

Why? Well, you see, as he sang, it seemed like he was doing a gig instead singing as a contestant.
This year’s AJL was much better than last year’s and I kind of like this year’s theme:

ILUMINASI MUZIK (The Enlightenment of Music).

Each contestant portrayed various genre and style. I must admit that we are becoming much better in producing good music, although we have yet to break into international market (minus BRUNEI, this country is our main music importer so far! Indonesia and Singapore? Well, they’re ahead of us already! KARYAWAN, calling for your jurisdiction here!

One good thing this time, SuperFaizal managed to present his numbers, unlike last year, when he was still temporarily banned from performing publicly (bell ringer: HE STRIPPED HIS SHIRT OFF ON A NATIONAL TV!). But I guess, it was a blessing in disguise. For his comeback from 3-month sabbatical leave last year, HE GOT THE CHANCE TO SING HIS SONGS! Lucky you, *OIAM’s Superboy!

I really like his dramatic performance for SAMPAI SYURGA! Very, very LAID BACK!

I won’t be writing down everything that had occurred during the show; you guys will or would definitely get the reviews from the papers today.

Congratulations to Meet Uncle Hussein, your luck this time!

P/S: (A note to my housemate Ayu)

Mu nok ke tak kalu akak buak satu gruk macang Meet Uncle Hussein(g) tu? Kite buak la gruk namer dier I WANT TO SEE TIJOH (kumpulan nasyid indie kontemporari). Mu nok ke, Ayu?

Ayu tu dari Kemaman, Terengganu.

* OIAM = One in a Million (TV show)

Aku pasti KORANG pun TAKKAN faham!!

2009-01-18T12:44:00.002+08:00

(Fiona bermonolog)

Monyet! Ini lah dia kan. Korang memang nampak sangat gila kuasa dan glamer. Setakat korang glamer dan terkenal (ko yang kata dulu kan) serta berbangga dengan gelaran JUARA KAMPUNG, baik ko balik ke bilik dan renung balik SEGALA USAHA KERAS ko selama ni. Usaha keras ke? Standard kekampungan ko tu, ye lah agak nye kan!
Siapalah aku nak dibandingkan dengan korang yang bajet terer (a'ah, teroris), bersuara lantang, lucu (tapi tahap bodoh Jessica Simpson yang tak tau beza antara ayam dan ikan tuna) dan apa saja yang HEBAT pasal korang.

(Tiba-tiba O'Teck datang dengan wajah yang penuh curiga)

Fio, kenapa ni? Ada masalah ke? Kenapa marah-marah ni?

(Fiona, menjeling tajam dan lihat kat audiens)

Muka aku macam marah ke? Eh, perasan pulak korang ya? Ingatkan aku dan orang-orang senasib dengan aku ni tak diberi perhatian! Apa? Ingat tunggu aku 'meletop' baru nak dengar cakap aku ke?

(Fiona berjalan keluar dari pentas, lampu fade out, O'Teck terpinga-pinga sorang-sorang kat tengah stage)

I'm thinking of another profession!

2009-01-17T17:08:00.002+08:00

A photographer!

Bila sudah bergelar SENIOR...

2009-01-17T13:04:00.008+08:00

...apakah perlu KITA menengking, mengherdik, menyindir, mencaci ADIK-ADIK kita? Apakah itu namanya INDUCTION?

Agaknya ini kebiasaan orang-orang Malaysia; I'm talking about our students here. Sebut saja ORIENTATION or INDUCTION, perkara pertama sekali yang akan keluar dalam kepala otak adalah RAGGING.

A group of naive, fresh from school kids datang ke campus dengan pelbagai harapan untuk masa depan masing-masing. Ramai yang sedih terpaksa tinggalkan famili dan kawan-kawan di kampung, ini semua kerana nak dapatkan segulung diploma or ijazah.

Layanan kejam persis rejim Nazi atau Zionis daripada kebanyakan abang dan kakak senior menambahkan lagi rasa sebak kat dada diorang.

Aku bukanlah baik sangat, tapi mengenangkan insan-insan baru yang hadir di tapak kampus ni pun MANUSIA yang ada perasaan, aku tak setuju langsung dengan cara rakan-rakan se-BATCH aku melayan ahli-ahli baru fakulti.

Apa boleh buat, aku cuma ahli yang suaranya kurang dihiraukan, diendahkan.

Aku kurang popular di fakulti, jauh sekali cantik dan lawa.

I belong to the MINORITY group, whose main job is to SHUT their lips.

And at the same time, aku tidak ada niat nak sebelahkan budak-budak baru itu, mereka pun ada 'slack' yang tersendiri.

Where got land without STORM, true or not??

(if aku cakap RAIN, dah tu kawasan gurun macam mana pulak kan?)

Hari pertama program induksi, aku gagahkan diri aku ke kampus, walaupun dalam hati ku menyumpah semua rakan-rakan aku kerana mereka telah berani mengacau waktu tidur aku pagi-pagi buta tu.

Nasib baik lah aku hanya ditugaskan bahagian dokumentasi, tak payah join jadi mentor budak-budak tu.

Tengah aku busy taking photos of the event, aku sempat observe muka-muka freshies. Mula-mula mereka agak bersemangat, tetapi oleh kerana ada seorang dua rakan se-batch aku ni menampakkan ciri-ciri DIKTATOR tahap monyet, maka mood mereka berubah sedikit demi sedikit.

Sebelum itu, sewaktu mesyuarat AJK program ini, ada satu suara mengatakan:

"Ingat, jangan senyum kat budak-budak tu, jangan senyum LANGSUNG!"

Gila kuasa! Itu saja yang mampu aku komenkan kat statement atas tu.

Dalam diam-diam, aku curi-curi senyum kat adik-adik freshie aku tu. At least diorang tak rasa teruk sangat, at least diorang dapat rasa yang bukan semua budak-budak senior 'kerek'. Dah aku ikhlas nak senyum kat diorang.

Nak aku ceritakan semua yang terjadi sepanjang program induksi ni, aku dah boleh buat buku MEMOIR SANG SENIOR, jadi aku tuliskan apa yang aku rasa penting saja untuk korang tau.

Malam ketiga program itu, selepas full-dress rehearsal semua kumpulan freshie, mereka ditahan sebelum balik ke dorm masing-masing. Kenapa?

Sebab rakan-rakan aku yang bijak ni nak budak-budak ni jalankan REFLEKSI atau muhasabah diri.

Aku tengok jam, dah pukul 11.15 dah. Setahu aku, dekan fakulti dah bagi arahan :TAK BOLEH BERADA KAT FAKLUTI SELEPAS JAM 11 MALAM!

Sesi refleksi itu pulak di-handle oleh seorang mamat batch aku yang poyonya tak nak blah. Rasa nak tergelak pun ada bila aku tengok cara dia kendalikan muhasabah ni. Bottom line dia aku tengok, cuma nak buat budak-budak freshie tu menangis. Dah selesai buat diorang 'banjir' kat depan tu, mamat ni berjalan ke belakang dan mengeluarkan jari hantunya sambil tersenyum bangga! Aku terkejut dengan lagak poyonya tu. Baru tadi eh, mamat tu bersyarah kat depan pasal ingat kat Allah, ingat kat mak bapak yang selama ni bersusah-payah jaga makan minum kita. Boleh pulak dia tunjuk sign 'F*CK' bila dah habis torture budak-budak tu. Mangkuk hayun betul!

Sampailah hari terakhir program tersebut, aku dah tak sanggup tengok muka mereka yang gilakan kuasa dan glamer taik kucing tu 'kerjakan' budak-budak tu.

All I want to say is that, AKU BERSYUKUR SANGAT-SANGAT PASAL SEPANJANG HIDUP AKU SO FAR, AKU TAK PERNAH KENA RAGGING MACAM TU SEKALI. Event yang sepatutnya jadi gelanggang menyambut kedatangan ahli-ahli baru, bertukar menjadi tempat mereka mempamerkan kebodohan mereka selama ini. Aku sangat malu, MALU YANG TERAMAT SANGAT!!

(Wajah adik-adik freshie baru-baru ni)

P/S: Aku hanya ingin dihormati bukan DISEMBAH mahupun disanjungi!

Our turn!

2009-01-10T17:53:00.005+08:00

The Pre-Induction Meeting 2009.

CT113 and CT114 students (Part 05) had their meeting last week.

Nazmy and Amir as the programme directors

The event will begin on the 11th January 2009 (Sunday) at 8.30 am, in Puncak Perdana Campus. I can't wait to meet our freshmen!

Tok Det tulis surat kat Obama...

2009-01-10T17:29:00.002+08:00

Dear Mr. President,

I did not vote for you in the Presidential Election because I am Malaysian.

But I consider myself one of your constituents because what you do or say will affect me and my country as well.I welcome your promise to change. Certainly your country, the United States of America need a lot of changes.

That is because America and Americans have become the best hated people in the world. Even Europeans dislike your arrogance. Yet you were once admired and liked because you freed a lot of countries from conquest and subjugation.It is the custom on New Year's day for people to make resolutions. You must have listed your good resolutions already. But may I politely suggest that you also resolve to do the following in pursuit of Change.

1) Stop killing people. The United States is too fond of killing people in order to achieve its objectives. You call it war, but today's wars are not about professional soldiers fighting and killing each other. It is about killing people, ordinary innocent people by the hundreds of thousands. Whole countries will be devastated. War is primitive, the cavemen's way of dealing with a problem. Stop your arms build up and your planning for future wars.

2) Stop indiscriminate support of Israeli killers with your money and your weapons. The planes and the bombs killing the people of Gaza are from you.

3) Stop applying sanctions against countries which cannot do the same against you. In Iraq your sanctions killed 500,000 children through depriving them of medicine and food. Others were born deformed.What have you achieved with this cruelty? Nothing except the hatred of the victims and right-thinking people.

4) Stop your scientists and researchers from inventing new and more diabolical weapons to kill more people more efficiently.

5) Stop your arms manufacturers from producing them. Stop your sales of arms to the world. It is blood money that you earn. It is un-Christian.

6) Stop trying to democratize all the countries of the world. Democracy may work for the United States but it does not always work for other countries. Don't kill people because they are not democratic. Your crusade to democratize countries has killed more people than the authoritarian Governments which you overthrew. And you have not succeeded anyway.

7) Stop the casinos which you call financial institutions. Stop hedge funds, derivatives and currency trading. Stop banks from lending non-existent money by the billions. Regulate and supervise your banks. Jail the miscreants who made profits from abusing the system.

8) Sign the Kyoto Protocol and other international agreements.

9) Show respect for the United Nations.

I have many other resolutions for change which I think you should consider and undertake.But I think you have enough on your plate for this 2009th year of the Christian Era.If you can do only a few of what I suggest you will be remembered by the world as a great leader.

Then the United States will again be the most admired nation. Your embassies will be able to take down the high fences and razor-wire coils that surround them.May I wish you a Happy New Year and a great Presidency.

Yours Sincerely,

Dr Mahathir bin Mohamad

(Former Prime Minister of Malaysia)

BERANI MATI

2009-01-10T16:30:00.007+08:00

Date: 08 January 2009
Venue: Stor Teater DBP, Kuala Lumpur

Time: 8.30 pm

The playwright and the director, Fasyali Fadzli.

The Jihad fighters: Razak, Lipan, Pian and Azhar

Another Jihad guy, Farid.

More of BERANI MATI here .

Bombs and Bullets keep on blasting...

2009-01-10T15:14:00.007+08:00

And people keep on cursing. As I watch the TV, read the papers, look at the horrible pictures, go through every blog I know (most of the bloggers had put up the same issue!), the feeling of repulsion seems to build up from within.

Every now and then, my mind had been intruded with the sickly images of dead or wounded children, wailing women over their men's bodies and soldiers, weapons and politicians making defensive and even offensive statements over the current war.

I know I'm not able to contribute any material aide. Moral support? I am NOBODY in these people's eyes.

On the other hand, I can only search and trace back some of the poems that are meant to be dedicated to those who are afflicted from wars and plagues.

The first one was written by Shivani Desai (SOMETIMES I THINK) :

Sometimes I think.......

Why do wars happen?

Why does the gap between the people widen?

Why do wars happen?

Sometimes I think.........

Millions lose their children because of wars;

Millions lose their parents because of wars;

and Millions enjoy their false victory because of wars.

Sometimes I think.........

Why do wars happen?

Why the gap between the people widen?

Why do wars happen?

This one was penned by Kayla Christopherson (SCARED LITTLE BOY) :

What did I do to deserve this?

I didn’t even know I was a crime

Am I the one they need to dismiss?

So soon so quick, not a lifetime

Can express what I wanted to do

So quick to end, to drop so sudden

You can’t understand, my life is new

It happened so fast, made my head spun

This is gun pointed directly at me

Why is all that I need to ask?

How long will this take, an eternity

Just do it and make it fast

Where am I, I can’t take it any more

Where’s my mother I can't see her?

I feel the shot in my inner core

All I can think is "I’m sorry sir"

This one is exceptionally CYNICAL. Written by Bekka Joe, this poem is called OUR LOVELY LITTLE WAR:

Red rose petals dancing

With the black cherry tree

Ashes falling and prancing

Darkness is all we see

Mountains are cracking

Rivers are dry

The sky (sun) is lacking

Children cry

War is going on

Fighting and killing all around

Our families are gone

And no love to be found

Hearts aching with pain

Dreams are lost

Tears falling in vein

Dying at no cost

So let us march out

And freely kill our brothers

"Fire" we shout

Then die like all the others

We shall dance this dance of death

And we (have) falling so far

Taking people’s last breath

And blowing up cars

But what of those who don’t want to die?

What of those who want to live?

When did we ever lie (to you)?

Our lives we don’t want to give

Celebrating CHRISTMAS the KABs' style (Part 2)

2009-01-08T12:05:00.011+08:00

Christmas Eve dinner. We did have roasted turkey but it was reserved for the guests on Christmas Day itself. Here, Dad is seen taking a portion of Cheese Cauliflower, a dish he knew when he was a student back in UK about 33 years ago.

The Midnight Service in Carmelite Church and Monastery in Miri. There were too many people as the Church of Mater Dei in Lutong and St. Joseph's Cathedral were also packed with the congregation.

On Christmas Day. Dad and his long time friend, Uncle David, were enjoying the mood and the topics from the past were discussed (chewah! saja letak!).

Yes, we had open house, but this was taken when the guests had left and I had the chance to capture this photo. Relaxing indeed.

My dear old friend (the BESTEST of my bestfriends) Grace came with her family in the evening.

Back to school!

2009-01-06T13:08:00.002+08:00

To begin with....(yawn!) HAPPY NEW YEAR 2009!

I'm in my final year now, to be precise, in my 5th Semester. Oh my, cepatnya masa lalu, faster than bullet train or the fighter jet.
Just got back from my dear old Sarawak on Sunday (Gosh! I will not be seeing MEE KOLOK, MANOK PANSOH or my dad's couch and TV until December!).
Those stuff explain my chubby look this semester..chubbier than ever. Well, who cares, really...I ENJOYED my break to the MAX last December.
Supposedly, I was to post on how I celebrated Christmas and the eve of new year recently, but it took me ages to transfer the photos from my cellphone. Yes, I will, if I'm free later on, post the 'holiday report'.
Okay, I may have to end here for the time being, got some lectures to attend at 2pm (oh! half an hour from now). I was in the first lecture on Entrepeneurship this morning. Boy! I thought I had enough with Financial Management when I was in my first year. Ada lagi rupanya! *sigh*

Adios!

Celebrating CHRISTMAS the KABs' style (Part 1)

2008-12-25T13:46:00.010+08:00

The front yard was trimmed and lawned for the festive season. ( Yes, I do miss this homely scene; I really like it during the evenings, plus the cool South China Sea breeze, chewah..ayat tak tahan hehe!).

When I got home (19th December 2008), this left me speechless. Firstly, I got mad because my brother did not wait for me to hang up the ornaments. Secondly, (gasp!)...I don't know...let's get back to the first reason.

I see, both men in my family must have had been very 'good boys' throughout the year, as they were so excited to receive a huge hamper from Santa Claus!

(Actually it was a gift from dad's friend, Mr. Chiew)

(To be continued)

Rest in Peace, Nek Rastin

2008-12-24T17:27:00.009+08:00

On 22nd December 2008, while Christians were busy preparing for Christmas, which is going to be tomorrow, an old friend of my family was called to be with the Lord.

Mathew Rastin Mayah, whom was affectionately known as Uncle Rastin or Nek Rastin by those who knew him, was given a solemn funeral this morning at St. Joseph's Cathedral, Miri.

THE FINAL ROSARY PRAYER AT NEK RASTIN'S RESIDENCE (23 DEc 2008)

THE FUNERAL

The celebrant was Rev. Fr. John Chia

His youngest son, Bobby was seen holding the deceased's portrait.

You guys must be wondering why did I post this today when I am supposed to be jovial for tomorrow.

Nek Rastin used to send and fetch me from school for a year when I was in Primary 1 (1990). Then he was already retired from Sarawak Shell Sdn. Bhd., an oil and gas company, of which my father was its employee too (Dad resigned in 1995).

I recall that Nek Rastin was a happy man, who loved to crack jokes and he was a devout Catholic. He used to wait for me at the school's gate and held my hand as we walked to his white Toyota Ace van. I was not the only kid in the van; his son Bobby along with few of his classmates and some students from the same school. I'd laugh to myself whenever the memory of more than 10 of us cramped in the van like a can of sardines flash in my mind. but I was very lucky back then, as I was always asked to sit in front with Nek Rastin. So-called VIP treatment hehe!

I had not met him in years until I heard the news of his demise from my dad days ago. Well, this is what I call LIFE, you'll never know when He's going to call you.

Nek Rastin, we're going to miss you and your wacky jokes. May the good Lord bless your soul. Amen.

It happened in Iraq last year!

2008-12-24T17:06:00.003+08:00

Tis the season to be jolly!

2008-12-24T01:50:00.009+08:00

I guessed these people must be the students of ICOM. They're good!

Sunway Pyramid's version of the Tree(S), 7 December 2008.

Okay, I was a little surprise, KLCC finally switched to traditional Christmas colour! Yay!

The HUGE Tenenbaum!

My friends Etha, Jujue and Koko sempat berposing di Pavilion. 11 December 2008.

MEANWHILE, back in the little kitchen in Miri...

Two members of the KAB clan are busy making biscuits, stuffing the turkey, baking tons and tons of cakes, as if they are going to feed the whole country. I offered my help...my job is just to keep things in order and sit down and observe them. Hohohohohohohoh!

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY HOLIDAY PEOPLE!

My Holiday means FOOD Adventure (Part 2)

2008-12-24T00:36:00.009+08:00

Spell this:

C-A-R-L-S-B-E-R-G = Thirst Quencher!

Okay, these steamed Shanghainese baos (or paus) are unique. Exquisitely unique, cest magnifique! Why? Kat dalam pau tu, ada sup! So before you boleh munch on the dumpling, you got to suck the soup from it. I tell you, HEAVEN!

Fragrant chrysanthemum Chinese tea, just perfect to wash down all those oily substance!

My Holiday means FOOD Adventure (Part 1)

2008-12-22T10:52:00.005+08:00

My Current BIBLE...

2008-12-22T10:26:00.004+08:00

You can say whatever you want (okay, after my post on Prisona, I will try to be more gentle, verbally lah!)

YOU can say whatever you wish; lelaki Amerika berkulit hitam ini yang bakal menjawat jawatan tertinggi di negara Uncle Sam itu telah membuktikan bahawa you don't need a "goodie two shoes" kind of background.

In my eyes, Obama merupakan antara contoh yang boleh dijadikan teladan dan rujukan dalam menghadapi kesukaran hidup.

Dreams From My Father recounts the tales from the President-elect's past. How he dealt with the ethnicity issues in his unique, multi-racial family, his struggle during his youth; drugs, peer pressure and discovering the most bitter of truths about his paternal side in Kenya.

I have not finish reading this book, yet, if possible I'll get back to this later on.

P/S: Kalau dapat habiskan sebelum Christmas, maybe I'll look for Obama's other work, The Audicity of Hope. Wish me luck ya!

Obama Speech on Victory (Part 1)

2008-12-22T02:32:00.001+08:00

If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible; who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time; who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer.

It's the answer told by lines that stretched around schools and churches in numbers this nation has never seen; by people who waited three hours and four hours, many for the very first time in their lives, because they believed that this time must be different; that their voice could be that difference.

It's the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Latino, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled - Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been a collection of Red States and Blue States: we are, and always will be, the United States of America.

It's the answer that led those who have been told for so long by so many to be cynical, and fearful, and doubtful of what we can achieve to put their hands on the arc of history and bend it once more toward the hope of a better day.

It's been a long time coming, but tonight, because of what we did on this day, in this election, at this defining moment, change has come to America.

MY NEW LOVE...at last!

2008-12-22T02:22:00.001+08:00

To a person by the name PRISONA

2008-12-20T21:21:00.002+08:00

Dearest PRISONA,
You previously commented on my post KISAH SATU MALAM:

"Belum pandai basuh kencing sendiri dah nak mekap2..."

Just one hell of a sentence for my dear so-called d*ck head PRISONA...

F**K YOU, clean up your own S**T, you A**HOLE!

Six Windows Netbooks Rated

2008-12-04T19:19:00.002+08:00

Asus Eee PC 904HA
Best combination of long battery life and well-designed keyboard:Its battery lasted more than 5 hours. We liked the large trackpad, which lets you use "multi-touch" gestures to scroll horizontally and vertically; zoom and rotate photos; scan and zoom Web pages; and more. That said, the trackpad buttons were hard to press. The Asus was also a bit larger than the other netbooks, was the heaviest at 3.1 pounds, and had the dimmest screen. You get 1GB of memory, a 160GB hard drive, Microsoft Works, and Skype for Internet phone calls. The Acer netbook had even longer battery life, but some drawbacks in its ergonomics.($400)

MSI Wind U100-016US
Best combination of a fine keyboard and light weight:If a large screen, superior keyboard, and easy-to-use trackpad are most important, this is your best choice. Its 10-inch screen was one of two that size we tested. It's matte rather than glossy, minimizing reflections. Battery life was a short 2 hours and 23 minutes, though. You get 1GB of memory, a 120GB hard drive, and 60-day trial versions of Microsoft Office 2007 and Norton Internet Security. The Wind weighs 2.5 pounds.(Starting at $399.99)

Lenovo IdeaPad S10
Best combination of compactness, large screen, and features:Lenovo did the best job of building a large 10-inch screen into a compact package. There's also a unique set of features, including an ExpressCard slot for connecting peripherals, such as cellular Internet cards, plus a disaster-recovery system to protect you from losing work. Battery life was relatively short at 2 hours and 40 minutes. You get 504MB of memory, an 80GB hard drive, and Norton Protection Center. Weight is 2.7 pounds. (Starting at $399.99)

Click here for more details.

More! More! Help! I Cannot Decide!

2008-11-28T18:26:00.008+08:00

CANDIDATE NO. 1

ASUS EEE PC 901

CANDIDATE NO. 2

ACER ASPIRE ONE

CANDIDATE NO. 3
BENQ Joybook Lite U1o1

Cute, I like!

Kisah SATU Malam...

2008-11-25T13:27:00.005+08:00

Cuti-Cuti Malaysia

2008-11-25T10:11:00.009+08:00

End of the year in Malaysia means FESTIVE season. Festive season means MEGA SALE all over the country!

(Latest info for SHOPAHOLICS : Mega Sale starts sometime in END of November 2008 and ends in EARLY January 2009)

BERKHATAN for the Boys!

As I have mentioned earlier on, holiday in Malaysia is closely associated with Festivities. Now these celebrations will claim the lives of cows, goats, sheep, and TOP on the list; POULTRY (Tok Yam dan Pak Tek la..)

People of various races, religions and backgrounds in this country 'ambil kesempatan' during the holidays to get hitched!

Americans are counting the days now...

2008-11-23T19:24:00.002+08:00

What did I find TODAY?

2008-11-21T17:32:00.004+08:00

PAK LAH, bangun! Bangun Pak Lah! Jangan tidur!

OBAMA talks about his HEROES: His granny, his mom and the First Lady Obama herself.

Datuk Seri, any chance of getting special discounts for fellow Sarawakians, eh?

HEART-less Woman. Bizarre!

Talam DUA muka, ini lah dia!

Source: Harian Metro & Kosmo, 21 November 2008

Di mana aku di MUSIM CUTI ini?

2008-11-21T12:02:00.007+08:00

Haha! Kantoi! Ada orang Facebook-ing!

I know, I know...boooorriinggg!! *yawn*!

R. S. E. D.

2008-11-21T10:34:00.004+08:00

Renungan Sejenak Ekonomi Dunia...

Stocks tumble for second day; Treasurys surge

By Tim Paradis and Sara Lepro, AP Business Writers

Thursday November 20, 7:12 pm ET

NEW YORK (AP):

Stocks plunge anew as hopes for immediate auto industry loans fade; financials, energy tumble
Stocks plunged for a second straight day Thursday, falling to levels not seen in at least five years, as financial and energy stocks tumbled while demand for the safety of government debt spiked.

Wall Street saw the most intense selling late in the session after hopes faded that lawmakers would quickly assemble an aid package for U.S. automakers, and as the Standard & Poor's 500 index broke through lows established in 2002. That breach of a key technical threshold sent a shudder through the market and touched off further selling.
The S&P 500 index fell 6.7 percent to its lowest close since April 1997. The Dow Jones industrial average, meanwhile, fell 445 points, or 5.6 percent, to its lowest close since March 2003. The decline brings the Dow's two-day drop to 873 points, or 10.6 percent, its worst two-day percentage loss since October 1987.

Financial stocks plunged on worries that the government's financial rescue won't be sufficient to cover banks' losses. Meanwhile, a sharp drop in oil prices weighed heavily on energy companies.
Thursday's pullback came amid heavy volume, a welcome sign for some investors who are looking for the market to experience a cathartic sell-off that could lay the groundwork for a recovery. Heavier volume can signal investors are scared enough to sell rather than simply sit on the sidelines, which can result in relatively light volume.
Observers said the selling highlighted the entrenched pessimism about the prospects for the economy.

"Unrelenting gloom has taken over the markets," said Dana Johnson, chief economist at Comerica Inc. "The economic news, the concerns about some major financial institutions, the concerns about the auto sector, earnings reports, everything is coming out in a way that is just provoking a massive selling in the stock market."
"Back in October we were looking at a potential catastrophic meltdown of the credit markets, and that didn't happen," he said. "But that doesn't mean tremendous damage hasn't been done to the economy."

Those worries about the economy sent the Dow down 444.99, or 5.56 percent, to 7,552.29. It was the biggest percentage drop for the blue chips since Oct. 22 and the Dow's lowest close since March 12, 2003.

Broader stock indicators also showed huge declines. The Standard & Poor's 500 index fell 54.14, or 6.71 percent, to 752.44, below the closing low of 776.76 logged on Oct. 9, 2002, to its lowest close since April 14, 1997.

The Nasdaq composite index fell 70.30, or 5.07 percent, to 1,316.12.
The Russell 2000 index of smaller companies fell 27.07, or 6.56 percent, to 385.31.

Declining issues outnumbered advancers by more than 10 to 1 on the New York Stock Exchange, where consolidated volume came to 8.96 billion shares, the heaviest level since the 11.20 billion seen on Oct. 10.

Jon Biele, head of capital markets at Cowen & Co., said investors are bracing for more bad news.
"The view on the floor is nobody is sure what the next stop is," he said. "I think the market is expecting another shoe to drop."

"Some people think this is the capitulation we've been waiting for," he said. "All along we've been hoping for a real violent sell-off and the end of the day today was a pretty dramatic move."
Bond prices showed stunning advances as investors clamored for the safety of government debt, sending Treasury yields to multiyear lows as fears about the auto industry make it hard for credit markets to function.

The yield on the benchmark 10-year Treasury note sank to 3.00 percent, the lowest point since 1958. The 30-year bond's yield fell to 3.46 percent -- the lowest since the government started issuing the bond in 1977. The yield on the 2-year note, meanwhile, fell to 0.97 percent -- the lowest since 1947, according to Global Financial Data in Los Angeles.

Stocks rose briefly during the session on hopes that Washington would agree to help Detroit's Big Three. But Democratic leaders in Congress delayed a vote on bailing out the auto industry until December and are asking General Motors, Ford and Chrsyler to present a plan to show how the $25 billion cash injection they have sought would be used.

Investors who have been groping for a bottom to the yearlong market rout have been worried that Washington's disagreements over whether to bail out the auto industry could lead to bankruptcies that would cascade into other industries and throw perhaps millions of workers out of work.

Automakers advanced on hopes that a deal might eventually be reached. General Motors Corp. rose 9 cents, or 3.2 percent, to $2.88, while Ford Motor Co. rose 13 cents, or 10.3 percent, to $1.39. Chrysler LLC isn't publicly traded.

Analysts said the worries about the automakers are only one of many concerns for the market. Biele noted that anxiety over Citigroup Inc.'s stability also battered stocks.
Citigroup tumbled below $5 a share Thursday -- their lowest level in more than 15 years, after investors found little solace in a Saudi prince's decision to boost his stake in the bank to 5 percent. The move failed to galvanize confidence among increasingly anxious investors concerned that Citigroup, which has racked up more than $20 billion in losses over the past four quarters, will post another large loss in the fourth quarter.
Citigroup fell $1.69, or 26 percent, to close at $4.71, and was the biggest decliner among the 30 stocks that make up the blue chips. Other financials showed big drops. JPMorgan Chase & Co. fell $5.09, or 18 percent, to $23.38, and Bank of America Corp. fell $1.81, or 14 percent, to $11.25.
Meanwhile, energy stocks fell sharply as oil tumbled $4 to settle at $49.62 on the New York Mercantile Exchange. Chesapeake Energy Corp. fell $5.32, or 28 percent, to $13.98, while Marathon Oil Corp. fell $4.53, or 19 percent, to $19.58.
Gus Scacco, managing director at AG Asset Management, said investors can't manage to regain confidence as the market continues to plumb new depths.
"We're trying to make a bottom but we keep breaking through," he said.

Wall Street found added room for concern as new claims for unemployment benefits climbed to a 16-year high. The Labor Department reported earlier Thursday that new applications for jobless benefits rose to a seasonally adjusted 542,000 last week from a downwardly revised figure of 515,000 in the previous week. That is well above economists' expectations of 505,000, according to a survey by Thomson Reuters.

"When you look at the typical forecast being produced by economists, they weren't writing down weak enough numbers and I think people are starting to understand with greater clarity just how deep this recession is going to be," Comerica's Johnson said.

The dollar rose against most major currencies but fell against the yen, while gold rose.
Overseas, Japan's Nikkei stock average fell 6.9 percent, while Hong Kong's Hang Seng Index slid 4.04 percent. Britain's FTSE 100 fell 3.26 percent, Germany's DAX index fell 3.08 percent, and France's CAC-40 fell 3.48 percent.

P/S: Scary kan....

OK ke Tak OK?

2008-11-20T15:59:00.003+08:00

Excuse me, my dears...

I'm not asking about the GIRL in the picture. Motif la aku tanya korang pasal pompuan ni?

Tu, yang dia pegang tu...Asus Eee PC.

Aku tau benda tu dah lama dah... maklumlah, aku bukannya kaki gadget.

Di kala aku tengah berstatus JANDA CYBER ni, nak tanya la kan kat korang...

Memang aku kejam, pasal tak sampai seminggu PARTNER ku, Si ACER 5050, kembali ke alam barzakh cyber, aku dah mencari pengganti...

Antara kriteria-kriteria yang aku nak sekarang adalah:

1) Senang nak bawa pi mana-mana, termasuk toilet (bukan aku sorang je buat macam tu!)

2) Comel, macam aku jugak

3) Tak berat

Kalau korang baca post ni, aku mintak jasa baik korang untuk rekomen kat aku pilihan lain jugak ye.

Aku ni macam berkenan kat warna hijau tu...kalau ada purple lagi mengancam hidup korang kan?

Breathe easy people, breathe easy

2008-11-20T14:43:00.004+08:00

Aku masuk ofis pagi tadi dengan senyuman yang ku kira hampir sama dengan budak perempuan kat atas tu...

Cuma...

Aku yakin aku lebih comel daripada dia. Nak buat macam mana kan...

Kenapa aku senyum?

KOMPUTER MENTOR AKU DAH NORMAL BALIK!!

Thank you Abang Hilman!!

Oh, jangan salah sangka ya...

Abang Hilman tu bukan boyfriend, kekasih, skandal atau dot dot dot aku....

Dia computer technician fakulti yang selamba mukanya dan control cool gitu...

Aku panggil dia ABANG pasal setiap hari aku ngadap muka dia time nak ambil kunci studio dan radio...

Aku hormat dan tabik kempitai kat dia...

Bukan kerana perasan aku kiut dan manja, walaupun aku nak juga berperangai sedemikian...kenalah maintain macho, bro!

Jadi sekarang, aku kembali dengan tugas aku di ofis yang bertemankan PC yang baru meragam semalam, TV berjenama Topsonic dan radio Sony yang banyak jasanya ketika latihan dramatari dijalankan...

Syukur, syukur!

Already fell down, then hit by staircase!

2008-11-19T17:18:00.005+08:00

Alah...if you translate direct into Bahasa Melayu, it will be:

Sudah jatuh, ditimpa tangga...lorrrr..!

Beginilah nasib aku sekarang.

Semalam, LAPTOP ku jadi arwah.

Hari ni, tepat jam 12.45pm, bertempat di bilik pejabat Tn. Hj. Tharuwat Ismail Bakti, selaku mentor aku di fakulti:

Desktop dia pulak buat hal!

Rasa nak jerit saja tau sekarang ni.

Belum kering lagi air mata aku mengenang status JANDA CYBER ku ini.

Macam mana boleh jadi macam ni?

Kalau aku story kat korang sekarang ni, sure bulan Jun tahun 2010 korang boleh tidur dengan nyenyak.

Tapi aku ni tak lah sekejam firaun ke, George Bush ke, Hitler ke kan..

Jadi aku khabarkan saja point-point utama dalam kes aku ni.

Tapi bagaimana aku nak mula ya?

Tatkala budak-budak fakulti aku berduyun-duyun pulang ke kampung halaman masing-masing (cuti semester UiTM bermula hari ini, 19 November 2008)...

Aku dan beberapa insan se-status dengan aku (status PELAJAR lah!)...

Stay back atas urusan kerja 'extra' masing-masing...

Ada yang praktikal, ada yang saja tolong lecturer dengan holiday job..

Bagi aku, aku termasuk dalam kategori yang ke-2..HOLIDAY JOB la...

Aku akan balik ke Sarawak untuk raya Krismas bulan depan.

Musim cuti ni, aku tolong mentor aku buat documentation pasal contribution dia dan arwah ayah dia kepada bidang seni persembahan negara. Selain daripada itu, moga betul la hendaknya, seorang lagi pensyarah aku dah offer another job cuti ni.

Jadi, aku short-cut kan saja la cerita.

Tengahari tadi, lepas balik dari lunch, aku masuk pejabat seperti biasa.

Aku switch on PC lecturer aku tu, pasal aku dan rakan sekerja aku yang selalu handle PC tu..A'ah...aku pun ada partner dalam job ni, cuma dia balik ke Johor untuk berjumpa dengan kerabat beliau.

(Psst...mentor aku sebenarnya dia buta cyber sikit, aku tak nak komen lebih-lebih ya)

Aku nak sambung balik keje aku, sambil-sambil tu nak blogging and Facebooking.

Tiba-tiba...

Beep! Beep! Beep!

Kat CPU: Lampu MERAH menyala

Kat Monitor: (tertera kat situ) NO SIGNAL.

Sekali lagi, I got panick attack.

Tidak! TIdak! TIDAAAAAAAAAKKKK!

Aku MENJANDA buat kali ke-3

2008-11-19T10:19:00.005+08:00

Tanggal 18 November 2008,

aku disahkan sekali lagi dengan status JANDA.

Ini adalah kali ke-tiga aku bergelar janda.

Bukan perpisahan yang disengajakan.

Sayangku telah diseru kembali ke tempat yang sepatutnya.

Tepat jam 1:10 petang semalam, rakan baikku Fairuz menghantar SMS.

"Petang ini aku balik. Sorry. Aku tak dapat selamatkan dia. There's nothing we can do. Dah teruk sangat."

SMS itu seperti kilat yang menyambar nyawa aku. Tak dapat diselamatkan? Dunia aku bagaikan gelap, lagi gelap daripada taukeh kedai runcit India kat Puncak Square tu.

Aku buntu. Baru hampir 2 tahun aku melayari bahtera cinta dan menyulam kasih bersamanya.

Tuhan bagaikan menghukum aku. Apa salah aku, hingga sayangku dibawa pergi?

Seperti sayang-sayangku yang terdahulu.

Tahun 2002, aku dan sayangku yang pertama. Kasih kami tergantung di tengah jalan ketika aku meninggalkan Miri, kampung halamanku. dia 'pergi' tatkala ku kembali sementara ke Miri setahun setengah kemudian. (Mungkin silap aku)

Pada tahun 2003 (memang silap aku, aku belum berpisah dengan yang pertama ketika itu), aku menemui cinta kedua di Kuala Lumpur. Comel, gagah, itulah rupanya.

Tapi kami bertahan selama 2 tahun setengah sebelum cinta kedua ku meninggalkan aku, terkapai-kapai di kota metroplitan ini.

Ketika aku cuba membuka lembaran baru dalam hidupku, Tuhan menemukan aku dengan jodoh ke yang ke-tiga. My perfect CHRISTMAS present.

Dia lengkap. Jatuh cinta pada pandangan pertama.

Pelbagai rintangan dan cabaran yang kami lalui. Banyak kejayaan dan kegagalan material yang kami berdua capai.

Beberapa bulan yang lepas, sayangku yang satu ini diusik si VIRUS durjana. Setan! Sial kau VIRUS!

Namun, sayangku dapat diselamatkan. Kau memang sial, VIRUS!

Aku sempat menikmati saat-saat terindah bersama sayangku sehingga...

SATU HARI...

Aku ingin berbual dengan sayang ku...

Aku mengejutkannya dari lenanya..

HAIRAN...

Cuma nadinya yang ada..

Dia langsung tidak membuka matanya...

Aku kaget...

Aku panik...

Fairuz, rakan baikku, dia ku hubungi secepat mungkin...

Dibelek, diperiksa...

Aku cuma berserah...

Namun, saat yang aku takuti dan geruni, terjadi juga akhirnya...

Dia sudah TIADA...

Apa harus aku beritahu ayah ku?

Sudah pasti aku dimarahinya...

Why?! WHY?! Why me?!!

Oh LAPTOP ku sayang!!
Acer Serie 5050

Rest-in-Peace

10 December 2006 - 18 November 2008

To my SLEEPING PARTNERS...

2008-11-19T10:04:00.007+08:00

...GOOD RIDDANCE to all of YOU!

Terima kasih for all the good times we had in the past...

Bukan aku tak nak kat korang lagi dah, tapi aku rasa dah masa aku bagitau kat korang semua.

Being with all of you, aku terasa 'suwey' semacam, ada saja yang tak kena beberapa ketika ni.

Bukan aku tak sayang korang, tapi...

Setiap permulaan akan pasti ada penamatnya...

Setiap pertemuan akan adanya perpisahan, well, itu adat hidup di dunia ini...

Aku bukanlah ibarat kacang yang 'forget its skin'...aku tahu siapa diriku ini...

Percayalah bahawa setiap benda yang dihidupkan memang one day nanti akan mati juga...

Jadi, aku terpaksa lepaskan korang, demi kebaikan semua orang di sekeliling kita...

Oh, my SLEEPING PARTNERS....izinkan aku lepaskan korang pergi...masuk ke TONG SAMPAH di Apartment Resak...

Goodbye BANTAL-BANTAL ku...

PRACTICAL TIME!

2008-11-16T14:24:00.005+08:00

Well, belum lagi actually...My practical will resume next semester, end of term to be exact. The pictures above were taken during a photoshoot with our mentor, Hj. Mohamed Tharuwat at his house in Datuk Keramat, Kuala Lumpur, last semester.

After our final examinations last week, En. Saad Omar, our practicum coordinator, distributed the internship forms to us.

My friend Siu and I, have decided to be interns under ASTANA (Akademi Seni Tari Nasional), a group which Hj. Tharuwat belongs to.

So...AJA! AJA! Fighting!

Untuk direnung-renungkan...

2008-11-16T12:06:00.007+08:00

The Brazilian author, Paulo Coelho, scribed this in his book, The Fifth Mountain:

In my book The Alchemist, the central thesis lies in a phrase that King Melchizedek says to the shepherd boy santiago: "When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it."
I believe this with all my heart. However, the act of living one's own destiny includes a series of stages that are far beyond our understanding, whose objective is always to take us back to the path of our Personal Legend - or to make us learn the lessons necessary to fulfill our own destiny. I think I can better illustrate when I am saying by relating an episode in my life.
On august 12, 1979, I went to sleep with a single certainty: at the age of thirty I was successfully making my way to the top of my career as a recording executive. I was working as artistic director for CBS in Brazil, and I had just been invited to the United States to talk to the owners of the company, who would surely provide me with every opportunity to achieve all that I desired to do in my area. Of course my great dream - to be a WRITER - had been set aside, but what did that matter? After all, real life was very different from what I had imagined; there was no way to earn living from literature in Brazil.

That night I made a decision: to abandon my dream. One had to adapt to circumstances and take advantage of opportunities. If my heart protested, I could deceive it by composing song lyrics whenever I wanted, and by doing some writing now and then for some newspaper. Besides, I was convinced that my life had taken a different path, but one no less exciting: a brilliant future awaited me in the world of the music multinationals.

When I woke up, I received a phone call from the president: I had just been fired, without further explanation. Although I knocked on various doors in the next two years, I never found a position again in that field.

When I finished writing Fifth Mountain, I recalled that episode - and other manifestations of the unavoidable in my life. Whenever I thought myself the absolute master of a situation, something would happen to cast me down. I asked myself: why? Can it be that I'm condemned to always come close but never reach the finish line? Can God be so cruel that He would let me see the palm trees on the horizon only to have me die of thirst in the desert?

It took a long time to understand that it wasn't quite like that. There are things that are brought into our lives to lead us back to the true path of our Personal Legend. Other things arise so we can apply all that we have learned. And, finally, some things come along to teach us.

In my book The Pilgrimage, I tried to show that these teachings need not be linked to pain and suffering; discipline and attentiveness alone are enough. Although this understanding has become an important blessing in my life, it still did not equip me to transit certain difficult moments that I experienced, even with total discipline and attentiveness.

One example is the case that I have cited; I was a serious professional, made every effort to give the best there was in me, and had ideas that even today I consider wothwhile. But the unavoidable happened, at the very moment when I felt most secure and confident. I believe I am not alone in this experience; the unavoidable has touched the life of every human being on the face of the earth. Some have rebounded, others have given up - but all of us have felt the wings of tragedy brushing against us.

P/S: For my Friendster buddies, yes, I admit that I skipped Arundhati Roy's The God of Small Things, as I find this book is much more interesting. Sorry! :)

Dear World, I TOLD YOU SO...

2008-11-05T23:27:00.000+08:00

Months ago, I wrote something about me favouring Mr. Obama's leadership skills and charisma. Hours ago, today, 5th November, 2008, back in the land of dreams, John McCain, the Republican's old wartime stallion, was defeated by Democrat's hope and golden boy Barack Hussein Obama Jr. I knew it that Obama was going to be America's 44th President.

Why JALAN CINTA?

2008-10-11T19:53:00.002+08:00

1. Aku bukannya FRUST.
2. Lagu ni tidak ada kaitan dengan love life aku.
3. Apa? Kau ingat cinta tu peluk-peluk, cium-cium saja? ORANG ATAS tu, kau tak ingat?
4. Habis tu, salah kah aku letak lagu ni dalam blog aku?
5. Kalau kau tengok filem AYAT-AYAT CINTA, mungkin senang aku nak explain.
6. Tak, aku tak sedih.
7. Aku dah cakap dah, AKU TAK FRUST.
8. Lantak kau lah.

Jalan Cinta Video Clip

2008-10-11T19:44:00.001+08:00

Semua resah hati manusiamu
Untuk membagi kisah atas nama cinta
Derai air mata di setiap sujudmu
seperti tak pernah cukup untuk menjagaku
Jangan butakan hati menjadi cinta yang semu

Kau hembuskan ayat-ayat cinta untukku
Di sela doa dalam malam-malam yang sunyi

Ampun yang engkau pinta dalam semua keraguan yg tlah meliputi jiwamu
Semoga akan membawa cintamu

Pada diriku dalam jalan dan ridho-Nya
Jangan butakan hati menjadi cinta yang semu

Kau hembuskan ayat-ayat cinta untukku
Di tengah terik matahari dan dinginnya malam
Kau panjatkan ayat-ayat cinta pada-Nya
Melindungi dan menjaga kisah cinta kita

What is right then? You tell me!

2008-10-11T19:18:00.002+08:00

Sedar tak sedar, it's been 2 months or so since aku last tulis blog. Busy. Funny, that particular word dah jadi my 'flesh and blood' akhir-akhir ni.
I don't know if you guys would say that aku ni macam tak bersyukur dengan apa yang aku dah dapat setakat ni.
Bukan maksud aku nak merungut tak tentu hala, but seriously I'm damn tired, EXHAUSTED, precisely.
Perkara yang paling aku takut dalam meniti hidup ini, is to go through a phase called DILEMMA.
Banyak.
Tak terkira.
Aku mula ambil kisah dengan akibat setiap langkah dan perbuatanku.
Apa kata orang? Apa orang lain akan buat kalau aku buat sesuatu perkara?
Padahal, I was not like that.
THE Fiona I know is strong and defiant.
THIS Fiona I know NOW seems helpless and weak.
Apa yang betul?
Ingin aku persetankan sahaja semua perkara remeh-temeh...but seriously, I'm helpless and I can't get those annoying thoughts out from my head.
Apa yang betul sebenarnya?